Written by Lily
I have every Erma Bombeck book that she ever wrote. I found her book, The Grass is Always Greener over the Septic Tank in the high school library. I thought it was cute and liked how she described her adventure of moving her family from the city to settle the new territory of suburbia. It was a view from my parent’s generation. I spent most of my childhood in one of the neighborhoods Erma described. No trees, little slab homes that all look alike, all of the kids running in and out of the neighbor’s houses to get their friends to ride bikes.
It was a time when I overheard the second grade teachers talking about how bold they felt for putting the title “Ms.” in front of their name on the sign outside their classroom. It surprised many when Erma campaigned for the the failed ERA amendment. It was a strong stand for her to take and she received criticism. She was who she was.
Erma was born in 1927, and became a mother during the baby boom. I became a young mother in 1982 and started picking up the rest of her books. I followed her into the then present day and until her death in 1996. Erma showed her struggle in life as coping with the way things are.versus the idealized version we think we should be able to achieve with ease. She wrote about her home life; being a woman, a mom and a wife. I liked seeing the world through the eyes of someone who had gone through it and was still experiencing it. Someone who could make fun of herself and her imperfections. Erma acknowledged the boredom and drudge work. Her comedic exaggerations offered support to those of us who felt the same way. I would laugh out loud when I was reading the anecdotes of what went on in her home. She could also make me choke up. In the middle of the funny tale of woe, she would capture the sentiment that makes it all worthwhile. Erma’s writing was like a good chic flick, refreshing, light and tearful.
As Erma continued her career, she revealed more of herself to readers and I appreciated it. In a more personal way she discussed the growth of her marriage and career. She disclosed her feelings with honesty when she became pregnant in her forties and then the following guilt and grief when she miscarried. She also wrote of her breast cancer diagnosis which resulted in a mastectomy.
Her last book, All I Know About Animal Behavior I learned in Loehmann’s Dressing Room, was published in 1995 and she passed away in 1996. She had shared so much of herself in her writings that I felt a personal loss. I have three favorite books of hers that I have reread many times.
Motherhood: The Second Oldest Profession, 1983.
Family — The Ties that Bind … and Gag!, 1987.
A Marriage Made in Heaven … or Too Tired For an Affair, 1993
This is one of my favorite excerpts from Motherhood: The Second Oldest Profession.
Motherhood is the biggest on the job training program in existence today.
Motherhood is not a one size fits all. It’s not a mold that is all-encompassing and does not mean the same thing to all people.
Some mothers give standing ovations to bowel movements. Other mothers reserve their excitement for an affair.
Some mothers have so much guilt they cannot eat a breath mint without sharing it. Other mothers feel nothing when they tell a kid his entire pillowcase of Halloween candy got ants in it… and eats it herself.
Some mothers cry when their thirty-year-old daughters leave home and move to their apartments. Other mothers sell their twelve year old son’s bed when he goes to a long scout meeting.
I’ve always felt uncomfortable about the articles that eulogized me as a nurse, chauffeur, cook, housekeeper, financier, counselor, philosopher, mistress, teacher, and hostess. It seemed that I always read an article like this on the day when my kid was in a school play and I ironed only the leg of the trouser that faced the audience, knitted all morning, napped all afternoon, bought a pizza for dinner, and had a headache by 10:30.
For a long time, I was afraid to laugh at the contrast, for fear no one else would.
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12 Responses to Amazing Women- Erma Bombeck
Lily, I haven’t read any books by Erma Bombeck, but I remember reading her newspaper column as a kid. I am sure it would resonate with me more today as a middle-aged mom!
I really loved the lines you chose to quote. I especially liked:
“Motherhood is not a one size fits all. It’s not a mold that is all-encompassing and does not mean the same thing to all people.”
Thank you, Erma, for writing those words so many years ago. I think there are many women in the Gosselin blogosphere who would do well to read those words and take them to heart.
I think I read her first book (my mother got it out of the library, too.) I also read her column in the newspaper as a kid. She was a very funny, compassionate writer. Thanks Lily!
I remember Bombeck from my childhood as one of the “older” humorists who I actually found funny and not corny. Her humor is timeless.
My Grandmother had all of Erma Bombeck’s books, and I would read them when I was a kid visiting at her house. I hadn’t thought about them in years. Sadly, my Grandma passed away in September, but thinking of the times I spent reading those books reminds of how much I loved being at her place, and how those books probably helped shaped the way I think about life in general. Erma’s writing was always entertaining and insightful, just like my Grandma. Thanks for reminding me of this.
Wow, you are bringing back memories of my younger years. I remember reading The Grass is Always Greener Over The Septic Tank, but I seem to remember Erma Bombeck being on t.v. a lot too. Can’t remember if she had her own show or was just so popular she was a guest on a lot of shows. Her book titles are amusing all by themselves. What really hit the memory button was the ERA, though. Oh, the things I’ve forgotten. I’m going to search my parents’ bookshelves next time I’m there to see if I can find any Erma Bombeck books.
Erma Bombeck was the same age as my mother and my mother just loved her. We also had her books and read her column faithfully in the local newspaper starting back in the 60s. I think I was around 10 when her column first appeared and my mom use to read it to me and my sister.
This was one of my favorite quotes:
“The only reason I would take up jogging is so I could hear heavy breathing again.”
My mom too, Pam…born in 1927 and she’s the reason I was aware of Erma Bombeck.
I love Erma Bombeck. And while certainly not my era, I still identify with so much of what she wrote. Her humor and observations are timeless. I was very saddened when she died, I was a young mother with 3 small children and very much living everything she wrote about. A few months ago, a friend passed on her copy of The Grass is Always Greener Over The Septic Tank. Tattered, dogearned and nearly falling apart, it won’t be passed on. I’m keeping it for myself!
I love Erma Bombeck. My Mom too turned me on to her, it was one day after I came into the kitchen and saw my Mom hiding a brownie under a dish towel and I asked her what she was doing, she said she was saving it for herself for later, she said she learned that trick from Erma Bombeck because Erma said she knew no one would ever pick up a dish towel! I loved it! From that moment on I was hooked! I was about thirteen or fourteen at the time and I used to read her column religiously after that, it ran in one of the Long Island newspapers.
Great article!
I’ve never read anything she’s written, but now I really want to. The titles alone are hysterical.
It’s so nice to read all these comments about Erma. She’s not a household name and I wasn’t sure if anyone would be interested, but I have always admired her so much that I wanted to write something. It would be nice if her books carry over to the next generation. Since she wrote along w/her life, it’s an excellent history what it was like for our mothers/grandmothers. I never saw her on tv. I didn’t even know she was on then and I didn’t watch GMA.
Dawn, I am so sorry for the loss of your grandmother. Your memory of her is touching and those times sound wonderful. Thank you for sharing that with us.
Mary, Erma filmed segments and did interviews for Good Morning America from 1975 -86. They were filmed mostly in her home town and then shown on the show.
She did so much that it was hard to pick out what to write about her, but it warrants mentioning that all of the profits from her book I Want to Grow Hair, I Want to Grow Up, I Want to Go to Boise: Children Surviving Cancer, 1989, went and continue to go to either the American Cancer Society or the Eleanor Roosevelt International Cancer Research Fellowships.