By Jennie
“You have to read this book!” – words guaranteed to get my back up. There is nothing that guarantees quite the same combination of annoyance, guilt, resentment and the fear that I may be missing something as those six little words. My aunt (much loved by me in a general sense) is a great one for insisting that you read something that she loves (she does the same with movies), and usually my desire to read said book diminishes in proportion with each mention of it. Her latest recommendation is “The Help”, by Kathryn Stockett, a book I probably would have little interest in anyway, but one that goes on my “not if it were the last book on Earth” list simply because of her repeated raves. A few years ago, she nagged Anya into reading “The Secret Life of Bees”, and while Anya said it was a good book (she was much less effusive than my aunt, though), there is little that would convince me to read it at this point.
Is it stubborness on my part or just petty meanness? I’m not sure. I do feel guilty about it, but the guilt makes me even more resentful. Part of it is that I just know from experience that my aunt and I have very different tastes (something I don’t think she realizes); part of it is the hard sell, which tends to make me dig my heels in. I don’t know; I may be missing some great stuff this way, but it’s something I find hard to change.
Other times it’s not a specific person that makes me unwilling to read something, but just the general weight of public opinion. I used to joke that I was the only person on Earth who hadn’t read Dan Brown’s “The Da Vinci Code”, and while that’s a slight exaggeration, I do feel that it’s almost a perverse point of pride for me that I haven’t read it (again, this rule applies to movies, too – my mild interest in “Avatar” decreased every time I had to hear about it). I guess it’s a sort of snobbery, to a degree – even many who like the book admit it’s not great literature. But it’s not like I read nothing but great literature 24/7, anyway – right now, I’m reading the 10th Stephanie Plum book, for crying out loud. The fact is, I would probably like “The Da Vinci Code” if I read it – even if it’s dumb and badly-written, it’s supposed to be very entertaining, and sometimes that’s all I require from a book. But I feel weirdly as if I would be ceding some principal if I read “The Da Vinci Code” now. It doesn’t make any sense, I know.
The one I’m on the fence about now is not a single book but a trilogy, by the late Swedish author Stieg Larsson: “The Girl with The Dragon Tattoo”, “The Girl Who Played With Fire”, and the finale, “The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet’s Nest.” These books have been described as thrillers or mysteries, not necessarily genres that I habitually read, but they supposedly also have more to offer that standard genre fare. I tend to like series that follow characters over a period of time (assuming that I like the characters, of course), because it allows me, as a reader, to actually develop a connection to the story. These books have been extremely popular internationally; I believe that at least the first book has been made into a film in Sweden and is slated for a U.S. remake.
I’m intrigued but a little wary – I’ve known people who absolutely loved the books and others who couldn’t get into them. I tend to be very suggestible with books; unless you are someone (like my aforementioned aunt) whose tastes I am really clear on, I have a knee-jerk reaction that my impression will be the same as yours. If you hated a book, of course I won’t like it – it’s a terrible book! If you loved it, how can I not like it – it must be great! This reaction occurs in me on a visceral level, making it hard for me to really determine what I’ll like and what I won’t.
I think I’ll ask for the Larsson trilogy for my upcoming birthday, taking away some of the responsibility for it – everyone knows that if you get something as a gift there is less pressure to actually like it. In the best case scenario, I’ll find a new series I truly love.
What about you? How do you handle recommendations? Do you ever, like me, find yourself resenting subtle (or not so subtle) pressure to read something beloved by a friend or relative?









Comments
12 Responses to Books You HAVE To Read
I am the type of person that takes the recommendation, buys the book but never gets around to finishing (unless I discipline myself).
I read a lot of non-fiction so I literally have to force myself sometimes to recall the fact that “hey, you like fiction too! An escape from reality would be nice.”
I know, I”m weird. I’m also ADHD so it goes with the territory. I love books. I have many. Now if I could just read one at a time…. LOL!! (I exaggerate…somewhat)
I take recommendations with a grain of salt. I have enjoyed many of the books that friends recommended and there have been a few I am on the fence about, one of them being this trilogy. I read Dragon Tatoo and thought it was ok, but I wasn’t wild about it. Do I read the other two? I have the next but haven’t started it. I will get to it when I’ve finished some other things.
I rarely enjoy a book someone suggests to me. I really enjoy a good book series- but again, rarely a suggestion. We’re all so different in what we enjoy and why we like one book or another.
My husband is a voracious reader like you Jennie and he drives me nuts. He is always wanting me to read something that he has read. He enjoys the true murder mysteries the most and although I have an interest in reading these occasionally, it is not something I could read all of the time. I have to be in the right mood.
I can’t believe you are on the 10th Plum book. Good for you. We read the first one for our book club about a year ago? See that is one series of books that did not appeal to me. I read the first one and liked it but it is not something that really caught my interest that would make me read 10 books. Samantha is right in that we all are so different in what we like to read and I guess that is a good thing.
The thing about the Plum books is that I’ll read a couple of more serious fiction books and then I feel the need for something light, and Stephanie Plum seems just right. I can see why you wouldn’t feel the need to continue on the series, but I like having these books around as a palate cleanser occasionally.
I used to feel the same way about Oprah’s Book Club recommendations. I would intentionally not read them. It’s not that I don’t like Oprah and I am happy that she is encouraging so many people to read but I just thought that the books she recommends only became popular because so many people were reading them because “Oprah said so” and not necessarily because they were good. Does that make sense?
I will take a recommendation seriously depending on who is doing the recommending. If it is someone who’s literary opinion I respect then I am more likely to read it. I don’t think I resent pressure to read something. If I don’t find the story interesting or I just don’t trust the person’s opnion, then I won’t read it.
Who makes the recommendation is the clincher for me. I don’t always agree, but I usually try the book. I just spent a week at the shore with family and Dragon Tattoo is one of the books that came to the beach everyday with my nephew. Yes, he recommended it.
I’m the one who is always the annoying recommender
When I really love a book, I guess I really want others to get the same pleasure.
I also like others to read the book so we can discuss it.
My mom, my sister & I are all on the same page, my husband though is Jennie and I’m the Aunt. Although, I do make the effort to read some of his recommendations, he’s not usually interested in discussing the book, on my “chatty Cathy” level. lol I like to explore the characters, feelings it creates etc., a little too much for him:)
I used to feel slightly insulted when he a) would not read a book I recommend or B) reads a few pages & stops (Outlander was an example of that) now I just accept we have different tastes.
I’m better off with a book club…at least then it can be discussed, that’s one of the pleasures of a good book for me.
Momsby, I guess it’s fitting to follow you as I am deaf to others’ recommendations! Oh, I do read the NY Times best sellers & reviews, but by in large I find an author who is prolific & I could be gone for months w. just that 1 author….i.e Rosamund Pilcher, Ann Rivers Siddons ;0) I tried book clubs - as we moved quite often. It was a good way to meet neighbors – who could read. Fear meeting & discussing a chosen book that I did not like – reminded me of why this was not fun. I had done years of school, college & grad. reading mandated lists of so many books that went from elementery book reports, to professors asking questions of material that I couldn’t remember from reading just the night before~BORING stuff. Now it’s just me & my choice of book transporting me to places by delicious wordsmiths. (No, I won’t buy a Kindle. Every now & again, I’ll go back & reread what was catching dust for…5-10 years!)
Any suggestions for winter reading? I have a pile of books her to go through,but was wondering what everyone was reading now.
Paula,
I will see if we can come up with a more current thread on this.
I read a lot. I many times will read 2-4 books a week. I have been reading books by Nora Roberts lately. She has many that are series. I have not found one I dislike.
I read a book a bit ago called The Shack by William P. Young. It is a very interesting book that grabs you from the start.