By Anya
If over two years of following and writing about the Gosselin family has taught me anything, it is that people are not only interested in Jon and Kate, but also their loved ones, friends, business associates and neighbors. Wait – I don’t think anyone is really interested in their neighbors, but their neighbors (well, one or two in particular) seem awfully interested in Jon and Kate!
Curiosity about the Gosselins comes at a price for their families and close acquaintances. Look at the example of poor Gina Neild and how her name has been dragged through the mud by bloggers with an agenda. Most of Kate’s family and all of Jon’s family has said “no thank you” to this unwanted and frequently invasive attention.
The newest target of persistent speculation and attention is Ellen Ross, Jon Gosselin’s girlfriend since this spring. Despite the fact that Ellen has kept a low profile, the media have made it their mission to photograph her and to dig for information about her. Various blogs have weighed in with judgments – some positive and some negative, but mostly based on conjecture and personal opinion.
If you know IW, you know we are not big on hearsay. We have seen firsthand the damage that internet gossip can cause. The tabloids cause additional harm in their quest for juicy stories over the truth. So when Ellen Ross agreed to be interviewed by us, we were grateful for the opportunity to allow her to address what she perceives as the misconceptions and lies that have been spread about Jon and her.
Just as background: we submitted our questions to Ms. Ross and she responded by email. She said she preferred this method as it allowed her to be more thoughtful with her responses. We asked Ms. Ross to comment on several issues that we thought IW readers would be interested in. While she answered the majority of our questions, there were several she did not. Those questions generally involved Jon’s family and children. When she was unwilling to answer a question, she generally indicated the reason was that she did not feel it was her place to do so. Do we wish she had answered a few more questions? Sure. Do we respect her for not doing so? Yes.
Following is our interview with Ellen Ross.
Q: How did you and Jon meet? Were you aware of who he was?
A: Jon and I met through mutual friends. I knew who he was.
Q: Did you watch “Jon and Kate Plus 8?”
A: I only watched a few episodes here and there, but I didn’t really follow it.
Q: Did Jon’s reputation as a ladies man give you pause at first?
A: To me, Jon does not have a reputation as a “ladies man.” What the media perceives and believes of him, and how he is in real life, to the people that know him on a daily basis, are two totally different things.
Q: What attracted you to Jon?
A: He is very down to earth, funny, caring, and a very strong person.
Q: What qualities in Jon do you find admirable?
A: He’s very sweet, down to earth, and funny. I was always told that it’s very important to find a guy that can make you laugh. We have the same kind of personality so I think that’s why we get along so well.
Q: What is the one thing you have most in common with Jon?
A: We can make each other laugh.
Q: What have been the challenges of dating someone in the public eye?
A: Once you date someone in the public eye, you are in the public eye yourself. At first I thought it would be hard to deal with the criticism, but everyone close to me knows the truth and they support Jon and me 100% and that is most important to me. I don’t get caught up with what the magazines and internet say.
Q: How do feel about the paparazzi? Do they just pop up? Do you have a specific game plan for dealing with them?
A: It is definitely a new thing for me, I just pretend they aren’t there and go about doing my thing. I don’t speak to them or look directly at them.
Q: What are your career goals and aspirations?
A: I work for the state government and I have been there for 5 years.
Q: Do you have experience dealing with young children (i.e. do you have younger siblings/cousins). What are the fun parts of spending time with the kids? How exhausting is it!?
A: My younger brother and I are very close. Many of my friends have children and I enjoy spending time with kids.
Q: Were you nervous when Jon introduced you to his children?
A: Not at all.
Q: Have you met anyone in Jon’s family besides his children?
A: We attend regular family get togethers such as birthdays and cookouts, but beyond that I prefer not discuss as I don’t consider it my place to do so.
Q: Do you guys have any special plans for the summer?
A: We plan to do regular “couple” things such as cookouts, beach, family parties, day trips, etc.
Q: In what areas do you feel Jon especially excels as a dad?
A: The kids are always ecstatic to see him. He is always interacting with them and they are always smiling and laughing. They ALWAYS have fun with him.
Q: How did you feel about Jon tattooing your name on his back?
A: I have always supported anyone’s wished to get a tattoo as I feel it’s a form of self expression.
Q: Some websites are reporting that the Korean characters spell out Erin instead of Ellen. Any comment?
A: Korean writing is transposed differently into English. The translation is correct. It does read Ellen.
Q: How many days a week do you typically see Jon? How do you stay in touch when you are not together?
A: Jon and I are together as much as our schedules permit. We use our cell phones to keep in touch if we aren’t together.
Q: We have seen pictures of Jon and you walking a dog. Is this your pet? Do you care to share some details (name, breed, how long you have had him/her)?
A: I have 3 Chihuahuas. Pixie is 5 years old, Grace is 3 years old, and Stella is about 8 months old. Grace is in the picture of me and Jon. I love my dogs and I take them with me almost everywhere I go. I attend a lot of dog/chihuahua events with them and am a part of a few Chihuahua forums on the internet.
Q: US Magazine ran a story recently from unnamed sources stating you “hate kids” and were basically pursuing the relationship with Jon for publicity. Please comment.
A: Anyone can say anything they want and come off as a “reliable source.” Those who know me, know that it’s not true and that’s what is important to me. I have never hated kids or said that I hated them.
Q: What are the largest public misconceptions that you would like to clear up about yourself, Jon or the two of you as a couple?
A: I am not with Jon for the fame. I obviously have to accept the publicity that comes with him and the relationship and embrace it as much as I can. We do regular things just like a regular couple would. It just so happens that our relationship is a bit more public than others.
Q: Imperfectwomen.com believes in being upfront about the fact that we are works in progress and none of us are perfect. Would you share one of your imperfections?
A: Like a lot of other people, sometimes I let what other people say get to me, but I’ve definitely been working on that and I think I’m doing a pretty good job so far.
Q: Team Edward or Team Jacob
A: Team Jacob!!! I switched over!









Comments
158 Responses to Ellen Ross – In her own Words
Just a quick note before I head out the door.
Ellen Ross was a pleasure to correspond with. She was prompt with her replies and what she wrote was clear and concise. She appears to be very stable and down-to-earth. I think those are two big pluses. She is a big pet lover too. Aren’t those pups precious?
I know many of us have been sympathetic to Kate’s position over the last year plus, but I’d love it if we could keep the comments as positive as possible while expressing our thoughts.
Just my two cents…
Good interview Imperfect Women, as usual. Having a daughter around the same age as Ellen is I can’t help but think what my reaction would be it she was dating someone like Jon.
If my daughter told me she was dating a 33 year old divorced father of 8 kids with no job and she was the …what 6th, 7th girlfriend in less than a year…my response would be “it ain’t gonna happen”.
I am sure that Ellen is a nice and responsible young lady and has good intentions. I just don’t see anything positive coming out of this relationship for her.
I wish Ellen the best and I am thankful that she responded to your inquiries.But I tend to agree with Sage that he has alot of baggage to handle at this point in his life and that she is young and beautiful and does not need to be involved with someone with this type of baggage.
I think we have yet another 20something falling for the rescue fantasy: the guy’s just misunderstood; okay, maybe he’s made some mistakes, but that’s because his wife and/or previous girlfriends didn’t understand him or appreciate him like I do; all he needs is love and support, MY love and support to be exact, and he’ll do great things.
I hope I’m wrong but I keep getting the feeling he uses the kids as part of the attraction for twentysomethings vulnerable to the rescue fantasy, like that commercial where guys rent puppies & walk them in the park to attract girls.
She comes across more likable in this interview than she does in the other one that just came out, but, that makes me feel worse, not better. Jon’s NOT showing any signs of changing. This is just a secular, at home version of the Hailey is my soulmate/Rabbi Schmuley is showing me how to be a better ex-husband, father, friend, etc. I’d feel better if Jon showed any signs of appreciating that he had everything he claimed he wanted last year, including his freedom and a TV show. TLC was willing to film with each parent separately. I don’t for one minute believe Kate wanted anything other than a civilized divorce that would limit the trauma to the kids and not put the entire burden on her to be the breadwinner for the family. Jon chose associates that his then five-year olds could have recognized as bad news (I mean taking advice from MICHAEL LOHAN; what part of Michael Lohan’s life would any sane person want to emulate:the prison time, the immensely talented daughter whose life and career are in shambles, the string of failed relationships; the business failures?) and followed their advice even after it kept blowing up in his face. I hope Ellen doesn’t become just another bitter, angry casualty of Jon Gosselin trying to find himself.
I had a few email exchanges with Ellen in this process and she came across as level headed and pretty much in control of her life. Anyone her age that has worked the same job for 5 years has something going for her.
I hope something positive does come out of this relationship for both Ellen and Jon and at my age I can say that I was always able to take something away from my life experiences that were not so great and turn it into a positive at some point in my life.
Love the picture with her dogs. I am a dog lover also.
Pam says…Anyone her age that has worked the same job for 5 years has something going for her.
Thanks, Pam. That part impressed me too, but I am a bit biased having started with my current company right after high school and still being there today. 23 years…
I know it takes committment to work a regular job at that age. A lot of people aren’t mature enough. The good thing is you are young and can bounce back easier. I remember a couple of times going to concerts and not getting home until the middle of the night and going to work the next day. I couldn’t do that anymore!
If she hasn’t pursued college, she should because she appears very bright and writes well.
Gawd, I sound like such a Mom!!!!
Ellen seems like a nice girl,
I also read into it that she thinks if she loves him enough she can save him. Also the part about him being strong. Those two things tell me she is young and in love, I wish her the best, I don’t wanna be a debbie downer so I won’t say anymore.
I appreciate Ellen sharing her thoughts with us. She does seem like a bright, together young lady, and thus a step up from some of Jon Gosselin’s past girlfriends. That said, there is a part of me that thinks “you can do better” – not because I think Jon is a bad person, but because I think he has screwed up a lot in the past couple of years and needs, perhaps, to stand on his own two feet for a while to redeem himself. That said, I do wish them both the best.
She does seem like a nice person and I have a bad feeling that in the end, she’s going to get hurt.
Great interview though I would have asked her if she wanted to have children of her own some day. Honestly, Ellen sounds great and if she is just dating Jon that is good. But to me there are signs that it seems more serious than just dating. (Jon tatooed her name on his back within 2 months of meeting her and she is spending lots of time with the kids.) There are also signs that Jon does not want to quietly fade from the spotlight or get a stable job. (His meeting with producers and several Radar on Line interviews lately.(
Holding aside some of Jon’s more public mistakes over the past year +, there are two things that would concern me if Ellen was a loved one of mine. If it were one of my nieces in this situation, my concerns would be:
1) Jon is a 33 year old man without a stable work history. You are 10 years younger than he is and already have a stronger resume and work history than he does. If you proceed to the point of considering marriage, can you accept that fact that you may have to be the primary breadwinner in the family? Do you want a husband that you may have to support?
2) Jon already has 8 children. Do you want to have children of your own? If so, does Jon want to have more children? Is he able to? Do you want your children to have 8 older half siblings who may or may not resent them?
Thank you for providing a clear glimpse into Jon’s newest girlfriend. She does appear to be down to earth, a thoughtful and considerate person from her responses. I hope she provides stability for Jon and helps him heal some wounds. As in all divorces, people do find other people and this is no different. If Kate’s wish is to find someone to share her life with also, that I wish for her. I imagine she will keep a lower profile than Jon did while doing so.
Great interview, Anya. I think Ellen was very professional and down-to-earth with her answers. I’m glad there were some questions she didn’t answer and thought how she handled it was very professional. She seems very normal and level-headed to me. I do think she could do better than Jon, but then again, who knows? I hope maybe she will inspire Jon to get his stuff together. There is nothing more I would rather see than Jon having a career (other than tabloid crap) and a stable relationship with a nice girl.
First off let me say that I was one of those women who dated and married a man that I thought I could change. (Bad boys, as I call them, can be such fun) It doesn’t work! You change to accommodate that person, very rarely does the other person change. My advice to Ellen is the same advice I gave my daughter, date the bad boys, but don’t ever, ever marry one!
Personally, I’ve never understood the mentality of marrying someone in the belief that one can change the spouse. For starters, if the spouse changing is considered part of the package, then I’d question whether the person who needs this person to change truly loves the person they’re marrying. I wouldn’t say that if it was something minor that could be tweaked as part of the compromises needed to merge two separate lives into a real couple. However, if someone wants their intended to change something fundamental about themselves, yes, then I would question whether they truly love the person.
For Ellen, if she wants a future with Jon and, especially if she wants children of her own, then she’s going to have to take into account that she may never be in a position to be a SAHM, even if she wants to be, because those 8 kids, for another 10-15 years, are going to have a legally enforceable financial claim on Jon, or that he may not want more children.
I agree with Sage and Diane. But, Pam I totally understand your post #5. Maybe this is the relationship that will turn Jon around. Or, if it ends that Ellen makes it a postive and moves on.
I hope he turns his life around. I saw a clip on ET where he and Kate switch out the big black van and he’s not even looking at her. See, it’s that kind of pithy stuff he needs to work on. He’s got to stop playing those childish games and act like a grownup. If he can’ t even be respectful to the mother of his children, how can he improve as a supportive and nurtering significant other to another woman?
Deborah, that was funny…a debbie downer.
Great of her to agree to answer these questions and Anya- great job. I wish her the best, my initial feelings are that with each of Jon’s relationships they all seem to start out thinking he’s misunderstood- and then with time they change their thinking. She seems bright and hopefully things turn out well for her, regardless of what does or doesn’t happen with Jon.
Great Interview.
I just hope they take it slowly. I really hope that Jon can get his life back on track. I also know the first couple of years after a divorce are hard and I hope that he finds what he is looking for.
I hope he remembers that he is a father first and a boyfriend or husband second. I’m happy to see that he has moved close to his children.
Ellen seems like a very intelligent and grounded person. I wish her luck in whatever the future brings her.
I’m only a few years older than Ellen so you would think that I maybe understand where she is coming from, however, I do not! She sounds like a very nice but very nieve young person who is mature in some areas but extremly lacking maturity in other areas.
If she thinks that a man with no job, no prospects, 8 kids, tries to re-invent himself several times per month, hates the mother of his children with unbridled passion, lies, cheats, steals, is a womanizer, and pays $10K per session to a life coach is just a regular, down to earth guy then she not only fell off the turnip truck but was run over by it.
I sincerely hope that she is different from his other conquests and can/will be a positive influence on him, but most of all I hope she will wake up and smell the bacon before she gets hurt.
I, too am more impressed with Ellen than I thought I would be but I also get the impression of ‘he’s just misunderstood’ syndrome. No one turns a person around, they turn themselves around.
One of the things which still bothers me about Ellen is her photo op with Jon while taking the kids back home in Kate’s driveway. It was a photo op, no question about that.
If a woman has a sincere interest in a man and wants to be a good stepmother to his children, then one starts out of the right foot. This wasn’t the move of a very mature person, nor of a person with the proper intent. I’m sorry, it just wasn’t.
Good interview, Anya. Thanks. There are really great comments here. One thing I would add: Jon has made one change for the better that I see. He now lives only minutes from his kids and sees them on a regular basis. It’s possible he did this just because Ellen is a local girl, too. If that’s so, she has had a positive effect on him.
Ellen Ross Response: You guys need to understand…unless somethings is uttered from a person’s mouth, its not true. It’s an assumption made by reporters and writers. A picture can be taken so out of context. In the picture of Jon looking down, do you realize that was a 5 second period of time he looked down? Of course, the sites won’t buy pics of him looking up or at her, they aren’t as controversial. There are no photo ops. Half the time we don’t even see paps around, they hide. Its creepy. I could have stood and hid behind the van and said “no Leah, I can’t come hug you because the world might think it’s a photo op”, but I decided to go towards her and give her a hug because that’s what she deserved. I wish people would stop being so judgemental and harsh towards any and all celebs.
You know the quote – ’if you can’t say something nice’…well how about if you don’t know the facts then just don’t judge. Everything you read isn’t true. It’s sad. Those close to him know the real Jon, but when I look at the internet, it portrays lies and misconceptions. The only true things are what he says in interviews.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Ellen asked me to post this comment as she having problems doing so from her phone.
Sorry if that sounds like its atacking anyone. theres just a whole nother side to every celebrity story these days. now that i am on the other side of things, i understand them more.
Excellent interview Anya! It really seems like perhaps Jon is in a happy place again. The kid’s I’m sure are thrilled to have him living closer. Ellen sounds like a very mature young woman, with a good head on her shoulder’s. The constant scrutiny this entire family is under must be VERY difficult. I don’t envy them, I do however wish them all the best of luck & much happiness.
Ellen, your right those of us on the outside are sometimes far to quick to judge! The paps are creepy, hopefully they will leave you all alone soon. I personally think it’s disgusting that they seem to think it’s ok to harass the kids the way they do. I really wish there were laws that would protect the privacy of all celebs children.
Momsby says….Ellen, your right those of us on the outside are sometimes far to quick to judge!
Very well said, Momsby. Speaking just for myself, I have tried to really examine why I am so quick to do this.
Sometimes it is really hard not to judge. Sometimes it is all out there and how can you not have an opinion – I am thinking Mel Gibson here. And, yes, I am guilty of judging the judgers (this gets complicated!)
Ellen, I appreciate you speaking up. Your POV is appreciated.
I’m guilty of judging the judgers also, it’s just so darn hard not too!
I don’t have anything against her. She seems nice. I really hope that Jon is building a stable relationship with someone sensible and based on what she says, she’s an improvement of a cosmic order over Jon’s ex-es. The kids can only benefit from that, but I’m with Puff. She sounds naive and overly trusting. I accept that she wasn’t trying to create a photo-op in front of Kate and the kids’ home but I don’t buy that Jon wasn’t. He’s shown himself very eager to cooperate and even encourage pap/tabloid coverage. Especially during the DTWS period, I doubt there was ever any time that there weren’t at least a few paps in front of the house, particularly when the big blue van shows up. As for the cell phone thing, the thing that bothered me was that they were BOTH absorbed in their cell phones. I don’t think it’s the crime of the century against children, but it’s not like it has been anywhere near the first time when Jon has been shown absorbed in his cell phone in both in photos and even longer videotapes with one or more of his kids desperately trying to get attention. And, maybe it is unrealistic of me, but it would have been nice if Ellen had shown some empathy and understanding for a woman, the mother of his children, who is constantly being judged on the same “evidence” that Ellen rightly decries being used against her and/or Jon.
Also, the things that have gotten Jon in the most trouble in terms of public opinion ARE the things that he’s said in interviews.
I hope that Ellen’s involvement in Jon’s life represents a positive development for him. Everyone in his life will benefit from that.
PeggyP great points.
He’s shown himself very eager to cooperate and even encourage pap/tabloid coverage. Especially during the DTWS period, I doubt there was ever any time that there weren’t at least a few paps in front of the house, particularly when the big blue van shows up.
This is what I mean when we say he has to grow up and respect the mother of his children. He was the one who didn’t want the whole Jon & Kate plus 8 thing before and then he courts the paps now and wants to cling to that notoriety. He makes it his mission to go against Kate’s wishes just to spite her and regardless if it’s for order at the house/what is best for the kids. That’s what I find really sucky about Jon. A true man has respect for the mother of his children just because she’s the mother of his children. It’s the difference between right and wrong. (I can still see Chris Cuomo’s interview pop thru my head.)
And, maybe it is unrealistic of me, but it would have been nice if Ellen had shown some empathy and understanding for a woman, the mother of his children, who is constantly being judged on the same “evidence” that Ellen rightly decries being used against her and/or Jon.
EXACTLY!
A note to Ellen….and I apologize up front if I offend you in any way, that is not my intent….
Ellen, you do appear to be different than the other flavors of the month for Jon, but woman to woman….don’t you see how he’s treated the women he’s been with? If he doesn’t even have respect for the mother of his chidren, what makes you think he’ll not treat you badly, too? His children should always come first… their feelings, their thoughts, their peace of mind, their sense of security. Please tell him that. Perhaps you can be the one who makes him see the light. Maybe you’re supposed to be the voice of reason to make him snap out of his terrible behavior and shape up.
As far as the cell phones, for the love of those kids, I hope to hell nobody (Kate, Jon, anybody who has them in the car) is drivng and texting with them in the car.
First, I’d like to thank Anya for a wonderful interview. Great job!
I agree that you can not tell much of anything from a pap picture. However, I’ve seen and heard Jon speak and watched his antics since the split. He displayed himself plenty and had lots to say until the gag order and then the settlement. He continued on in different ways and filing for custody out of the blue was just another one. I certainly understand that people make bad choices in choosing a sig other.
I thought it was disrespectful for Ellen to show up at Kate’s home when she was not there. If that’s not what I happened, I apologize. Even if logistically, she had to be there, I think she should have stayed in the car. That seems minor in comparison to whatever implications she is making about Kate. Those are not her children and it’s not her place to make hidden accusations about their mother.
I think the comments here have been very respectful towards Ellen.
Lily-I agree. As for me, leaving the dropping off the kids situation and the cell phones completely out of it (Admittedly, the paps and the tabloids can take things totally out of context), I regarded Ellen’s remarks as “”and as for the last comment…about him respecting the mother of his kids.. if ONLY you guys knew …….. i look at it froma neutral point of view..until certain things came out.. remember this.. kids arent stupid, they see things, they get treated certain ways and THEY TALK…..” and later “please please please dont take sides anymore, im telling you stay neutral..eventually the truth comes out..when those kids are old enough to understand all this crap… you just wait….. the things they are going to say…….” as being completely out of line. I recognize she tried to backtrack in a subsequent post, but claiming that everyone is getting along fine and no one should take sides is not apologizing for or retracting the implied slurs against Kate.
Ellen, I don’t think anyone is trying to upset you. It’s great if Kate did not mind you being there when she was out of town. I know of many instances, as you mentioned, where the sig other is at the exchange. However, realistically and from my side looking in, if you’re new and w/Jon’s history not the first, you shouldn’t show up uninvited to the ex-wife’s home. As I stated above, if I was wrong and of course, I don’t know all the details, I apologize. I think you’ll find that aside from any opinion that the readers here want the best for the Gosselin children and that means hoping their parents are the best people they can be.
My statements about your comments, specifically the below, still stand. I do hope you clarify to take away any implication or misread inference towards Kate so I can change my opinion.
and as for the last comment…about him respecting the mother of his kids.. if ONLY you guys knew …….. i look at it froma neutral point of view..until certain things came out.. remember this.. kids arent stupid, they see things, they get treated certain ways and THEY TALK…..
please please please dont take sides anymore, im telling you stay neutral..eventually the truth comes out..when those kids are old enough to understand all this crap… you just wait….. the things they are going to say…
Wow, thanks for the added comments Ellen, reading so many different perceptions about yourself can’t be easy, you’ve got guts girl;0
Thanks for the reminder that although some of us may feel as if we “know” the Gosselin’s because of what we’ve witnessed on the show & through the media, we are just observers. This really is just a real family, living lifes ups & downs, it seems like everyone is just trying to do the best they can. (are not we all?)
I wish everyone who blogs about this family, would keep in mind that hurtful things that are being written, do have an impact. I hope some of the darksites will read this interview & remember that.
Ellen, thanks for clarifying.
I certainly learned some new things (Kate didn’t mind, that’s good to read.) You confirmed a suspicion of mine about the paps. I believe the paparazzi photos have to be ‘spun’ as drama or they won’t sell. Next time I see a photo of you looking at your phone, I’ll think, “Oh, she’s being nice and commenting at IW, lol!”
You wrote, “how boring would it be to put up a pic of me and jon watching the kids? its boring, theres nothing to criticize (although people still would fine SOMETHING) therefore the website wont get enough hits on that article and it loses its value.. THATS why they put those pics up……” I completely agree about this. People will criticize no matter what. The “drama” in these photos is often manufactured. All the paps have to do is put up photos of Jon grocery shopping or Kate walking barefoot and readers will imagine all sorts of ridiculous scenarios to entertain themselves.
I hope Jon is finished working with the paparazzi. He has spoken before about cooperating with them, but IMO it hasn’t helped him. I believe you that it is “creepy” to have someone taking your picture while hidden from your view. I am guessing it’ creepy for the kids, too. For their sakes, especially, I wish it would stop.
Ellen, thank you for coming back to clarify. Things can show up differently in print than how we’re thinking them in our head while typing it out. I appreciate you doing that and the initial interview as well. I wish the best for you and Jon.
PeggyP totally agree with post #33 and Lily’s #34. As well as Momsby’s #36 and Ann’s #37.
Ellen, what I was trying to get to was basically in general…a man must respect the mother of his children no matter who she or he is. That’s the true sign of a person who’s mature. It is life experience and falls into the category of being just the right thing to do, especially in front of the kids or on something they would eventually see.
No, I don’t know Jon as you do, but I have seen him berate his ex and cause all sorts of drama and contribute widely to making their breakup a public spectacle. Why would he do that to the mother of his children? (trying to hurt her hurts them just as much as her when he does that crap. It’s a blow to them.) That’s what I’m trying to say and understand. If a man doesn’t have the common courtesy to treat the mother of his children nicely and in a respectful manner, what does that say about him?
I would hope he is working on being a better man. Those kids and their mom deserve much better than what we have seen played out on tv (on the magazine shows, their show) by him. You deserve to be treated by a gentleman and a mature man, too. (not saying he doesn’t treat you nicely, but just look at his track record. You might have that to look foward to). Like I said upthread, maybe he is changing for the good, I hope.
I wish you luck and hope you don’t lose yourself as you have gone through a lot.
Just wanted to clarify as it might be confusing — Ellen did ask that we remove her last couple of comments.
about him respecting the mother of his kids.. if ONLY you guys knew …….. i look at it froma neutral point of view..until certain things came out.. remember this.. kids arent stupid, they see things, they get treated certain ways and THEY TALK…..
please please please dont take sides anymore, im telling you stay neutral..eventually the truth comes out..when those kids are old enough to understand all this crap… you just wait….. the things they are going to say…….
I find the above statement to be thoughtless and disrespectful not only to Kate, but the kids as well.
Being with someone in the public eye is not easy and it requires you to measure your words when speaking especially when children are involved.
I think maybe Ellen is the one who needs to stay neutral.
It really saddened me to see her say those things. I kind of had high hopes for her. Her comments reminded me of that first interview Hailey gave last summer and Hailey too said something like ” wait til you all find out the real truth”. Both Hailey and Ellen are young and they will make the mistakes all young women make, however the association with Jon makes their mistakes very public.
Now I am depressed.
It wasn’t the interview that showed us who Ellen was…it was the comments she made outside of the interview that showed us the real Ellen.
While I am sure Ellen feels she is under intense scrutiny I think she has been under far less tabloid scrutiny than Hailey was last year when the divorce was new. Perhaps a little empathy for Hailey is in order?
It wasn’t the interview that showed us who Ellen was…it was the comments she made outside of the interview that showed us the real Ellen.
I think that both do. People are complex. Ellen is young (if Ellen is still reading, she probably doesn’t like hearing that, but I have 17 years on her and she does seem young to me). Most people aren’t naturally thick-skinned – some manage to develop a thick skin because they have to, but I think most of us in her position might find it hard to have their lives dissected…
I’m not saying we’re wrong to talk about her or Jon here; she’s probably right when she says she shouldn’t have read the comments. I try to be fair to Jon (even if I am more on Kate’s “side” of things), but I’m sure I fail at times and if someone who cared about him read some of the things I wrote, I would not blame them for being pissed. I think if you’re inside of things you may be too close to really judge what’s “true”, and if you’re as far outside as we are, how do you really know that your perceptions are right? She’s right when she says we don’t really know these people. We just have one perspective; I’m comfortable expressing it (I try not to act like I have the ONE TRUE TRUTH about all things Gosselin when I do express my POV), but it’s not necessarily for everyone to read.
Jennie,
I can understand her feeling protective and wanting to defend her relationship with Jon. IMO she crossed the line by stating; when those kids are old enough to understand all this crap… you just wait….. the things they are going to say……. by Ellen saying “just you wait” she sounded spiteful, immature and insecure.
The kids and her implied relationship with their mother should never have entered Ellens remarks in her defense of her relationship with their father.
I have to agree with Pattypie above. If I were Kate she would not get near my kids.
I have never commented here before, but I was reading some of the comments and my mouth was open in disbelieve at some of Ellen’s comments.
We all say things we don’t mean at times, because we are all Imperfect Woman.
But the things Ellen implied about Kate was very irresponsible and vicious.
No one knows the REAL truth about the Gosselins marriage only Jon and Kate know. And at this time its a he said she said thing, The Kate haters don’t know , The show watchers don’t know no one knows.
I dated a man who was married before and he had a Daughter from that marriage.
He told me horrific storys about his ex wife and I remember I judged her and disliked her because of the things he said.
She turned out to be a wonderful friend of mine and he has been out of my life for many years now, but she is still a BFF.
Theresa says:
1. “a man must respect the mother of his children no matter who she or he is. ”
2. “No, I don’t know Jon as you do, but I have seen him berate his ex and cause all sorts of drama and contribute widely to making their breakup a public spectacle.”
_____________________________________________________________
3. Ellen made the remark – “while we’re watching the kids” -
4.” kids aren’t stupid, they see things, they get treated certain ways and THEY TALK”
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
1. Nothing more to add to that except to emphasis it, strongly.
2. If Ellen thinks Jon is telling her the complete truth about things between he and Kate, then
she is sadly mistaken. Jon tries to spin things in his direction in the public eye, why would
he not do so as well in a personal relationship? Hailey finally came to know who the real
Jon is. People can only present a facade of their true self for a short period of time and
their real self starts to leak out.
As a divorced mother who tried dating, and dating men also divorced with children, about 98% of the time, a man who has complaints against the ex and spoke badly of her, also proved to be men who were crap. And 99% of the complaints they had against their ex proved to be either completely false, or they weren’t telling the truth of what they actually had done or said to the ex. Unfortunately, I usually didn’t find out these things until after a break up as I found most people won’t tell you the truth while you are in the midst of the relationship with said person as they don’t want to get in the middle of things.
A good judge of someone is their past. Pay attention to it, don’t ignore it. To do so is beyond foolish.
3. ‘watching the kids’ – she refers to their visitation time with their father as if they are
babysitting.
4. You’re right kids aren’t stupid – and kids also, when they crave the attention of the absent parent after a divorce, when they are with the non-custodial parent, will say things in which they feel will please that parent, get that parents approval and attention. Jon showed that if the kids speak well of Kate while in his care, they get punished for it. Remember when Maddy and Cara said they liked Kate’s craft projects better than Jon’s? Jon accused them of being disrespectful and punished them.
Also, if there is another person with the non-custodial parent who is doing the main care taking of the kids and not the parent doing so, kids have a primal instinct to assure they are taken care of, they will often find ways withing their kid power to ‘kiss up’ so to speak to that person as in doing do, makes their care more assured and their treatment more pleasant. I am not saying Ellen would treat them otherwise under any circumstances, but kids often react this way even if they are treated well, it’s a kids way. They also know if they ‘kiss up’ to this person, it will please that parent.
Frankly, I think Ellen is very young and has walked into the middle of a situation which is far more complex than she understands or is willing to see. Nor do I think she understands what her place is in the midst of this.
I agree with Jennie, Pattypie, and Sage (## 40-44). I know Ellen is very new to being in the public eye, but I honestly don’t understand how she’d reasonably believe that Jon WOULDN’T come up in the comments, especially since she discussed Jon and her reaction to some of the stories about him & his reputation as it developed in the last year +. I also don’t think her initial statements about what the kids would say in the future could reasonably be interpreted as being as innocuous as she later claimed. The most important thing, though, is that if she believes that what she found here was disrespect, belittlement, and insults, this was an extremely decorous Victorian tea party compared to what Kate faces every day & that when Ellen says things like she did about what the kids say or might say in the future, that will be used by the hate sites as damning evidence against the mother of the children that I have no doubt that Ellen loves.
In retrospect, maybe, particularly at this early stage in the relationship, it might not have been a good idea for Ellen to be giving interviews. She doesn’t have experience in dealing with publicity. It’s a very delicate and complex situation for anyone who falls for someone who is newly divorced and a parent, particularly if the divorce was very nasty, even where there is no public interest in that person or their current relationship. A lowered profile for her might be advisable both to give her and Jon time to develop their relationship and to make her less of a target.
I doubt she can accept this at this point, but no one wishes her ill and I don’t think anyone who is reasonable wishes ill to Jon, regardless of what they might think of his recent behavior and decisions. I hope it works out and I hope they are happy since I think that would be in everyone’s best interests.
I just wanted to note that Ellen requested that her last three comments be deleted and we did. She was commenting via phone and she felt her comments were not coming across as she intended to. She also explained that her words were coming out “quickly and out of context” and she did attempt to clarify what she really meant but since she asked for the comments to be deleted I will just leave it at that.
Wow, I’m flabbergasted! Well, at least we can be sure of one thing–once again, Jon has another soul mate–two peas in a pod! At least Ellen has an excuse, she’s young and immature, but she’s on the same level of maturity that Jon is–these two wont last! Kate, call your attorney about Jon’s visitation–he needs to be reined in, soon!
I think Ellen handled herself very well in the interview. That reveals as much to me about her as her comments. As for the deleted comments, it is Ellen who asked that they be deleted. That shows a desire to retract them. I don’t think the interview was a disaster, and I hope Ellen feels better about it this morning. As for the comments, if they were a mistake, the solution is to clarify, retract, or delete. That’s been done.
Pattypie was depressed? Say it isn’t so. I hope that’s temporary, as her levity is welcome and necessary on the Gosselin threads.
I am not inclined to feel compassion for Hailey except as she was falsely accused of a break-in. That must have been scary and completely unjust. I understand why she is furious with Jon, but I can’t justify her cruel and humiliating taunts toward him. She knows he has 8 kids. That goes for any women making money by feeding tabloid rumors (glaring at Stephanie Santoro and Aunt Jodi here.)
I would bet many of us can think of situations where we heard one side of the story, made judgments, and had to change our minds like CocoPuff mentioned. I know I have.
Wanted to add: I disagree that “watching the kids” means dad is “babysitting.” Watching the kids implies something temporary, which it is for Ellen. They aren’t her children. Jon didn’t use the term, so we can’t really put that on him. It’s fine for Ellen to say that, IMO.
I don’t think Kate should try to reduce visitation. I think she should stick with her plan to have Jon with the kids as much as possible. It’s very important that the children be with and receive love from their father if he is going to be in their lives. He’s not a neglectful or abusive dad. There is no reason, IMO, that he shouldn’t be with them half of the time if possible. He is their dad. I am very happy for the whole family that he lives very close by now and can care for them.
Ann,
You made a excellent and extremely valid point regarding my comment from Ellen about watching the kids.
After reading your comment, I do see your point and I want to retract that comment here. As you said, Jon didn’t make that comment, Ellen did. For Ellen, it would be watching the kids. Which given no longer than she has been involved, would be an appropriate way to view it from Ellen’s point of view.
Although I speak negatively about Jon quite a bit, I don’t and never have felt his visitation should be limited. He is their dad, he will always be their dad.
I will give Ellen some benefit of the doubt as she is young and not adept at publicity and talking to any form of the media. But even given that exception, she was out of line for speaking about how she assumed the kids would talk about Kate in the future and giving innuendo’s about what the the kids have said to her regarding Kate. Kate is their mother, Jon and Kate have a more than 11 year history whereas Ellen has had only a few months. Anything the kids might possibility say to her, she should keep totally private, without even innuendo’s. For me, her comments regarding this aspect of things was completely inappropriate.
I think Ellen should have quit while she was ahead, with the interview. As Anya says in the introduction, Ellen felt more comfortable answering questions by email, so she could think out the answers. I don’t think she does well off the cuff.
I agree with Pattypie, Ellen is definitely not neutral in this. I don’t feel comfortable with her talking about the kids at all, since she has been in the picture for only a few months. She has no direct knowledge of the circumstances leading up to the current situation.
I’m glad she got her dog back.
She is emotionally involved with Jon. No, without question Ellen isn’t neutral.
She may like to feel she is, but she isn’t. The only way she could possibly be neutral is to have many long conversations with Kate getting her side of the story regarding things which Jon has told her.
I think it’s not presumptuous to assume that’s not gonna happen anytime soon.
It is impossible for a person to be neutral with only one side of a story.
I think it’s funny that Ellen actually know all these children and has conversed and interacted with them yet all of you think you know better just because there’s a chance it may make Kate look bad. Maybe she shouldn’t have said what she did because it seemed to imply something, but if she was implying something it’s most likely true. She said the children say things, not Jon, don’t put it on him. Leave Ellen alone. She was nice enough to come here and try to explain things. Don’t hang her for it.
Ellen and Jon have only been going out for about three months, and she hasn’t known the kids for the whole time. I really doubt they have been having many conversations with her about their parents.
Ellen referring to anything the children may have said to her is breeching the confidence of the children. Ellen has no legal standing with the children in any form. Nor is she any blood relative. Which even at that would be wrong to make such statements as the same would hold true, no legal standing and breeching the kids confidence.
Ellen choose to speak out, she choose to open herself up. The fact that she made that choice means that she shouldn’t be held accountable or her words questioned? Then the same standard should apply to Kate when she chooses to give her views on what’s going on in HER life.
It may be hard for you to understand that Ellen speaking out isn’t about Kate, it’s about Ellen and Ellen’s saying what the kids she claims have said to her and making references to that publicly. No one’s hanging her, only holding her accountable for her own words.
To my ear, Ellen said everything w. a very measured maturity that belied her youth. Having said that, she would have done Jon & his 8 a huge favor IF she had kindly refused ANY interview! What followed, was not unlike what would be expected from a young girl who has given over to everything Gosselin. Excuses, excuses & trying to explain away what is REAL in her life is not going to change anyone’s perception of what fills the rags & internet. Jon chose to use the ‘court of public opinion’ , & ONLY Jon can answer to his ‘maker’, his children, friends & family. If Ellen is his ultimate ‘soulmate’…who could not wish anything but happiness & good will?
I think you were kind to delete her responses. Hopefully Ellen will re-read…re-think what she wanted taken away. If only errors in life were that easy!
ITA with one thing Ellen said, and that is the Gosselin children are not stupid.
It is a very common thing for a child to complain about one parent to the other parent in divorce situations.
I bet the children fill Kate’s ears with complaints about Jon when they get home after spending time with him.
What Ellen implied was wrong on so many levels . Wrong X 8 !
Very correct, CoCo -
to put it completely bluntly, Ellen used what she said the children told her, IN PRIVATE, in an attempt to vilify Kate, THE CHILDREN’S MOTHER, PUBLICLY.
Although I’m glad she asked that her comments be deleted, she still put them out there PUBLICLY.
Did Ellen ask that the comments be removed because she realized what she said was wrong or because she was getting critized for her words.
As for myself, that is better than letting them stand, but not good enough. As she did allow them to be put out there publicly, she owes Kate a PUBLIC apology.
Like Pattypie, I was a little depressed after last night.
I felt bad for Ellen because I knew she was upset, but I also felt that IW and our posters were being criticized somewhat unfairly.
I do think the vast majority of us are careful with our words and how we choose to express our opinions. I don’t subscribe to the notion that because Jon and Kate signed up for a reality show or have made certain elements of their life public that we are free to discuss them in whatever way we want – using vile language, engaging in baseless speculation or just generally disregarding the Golden Rule. I know I am biased, but I believe the majority of the time we do a pretty good job of having civil and respectful conversations about the G’s and other controversial subjects (immigration reform anyone?).
I appreciate all the comments that have been made here. I very much agree with what Ann had to say. I also didn’t want Momsby’s comment from earlier last night to be overlooked because personally I think it is something that I constantly try to keep in mind:
Momsby says…Thanks for the reminder that although some of us may feel as if we “know” the Gosselin’s because of what we’ve witnessed on the show & through the media, we are just observers. This really is just a real family, living lifes ups & downs, it seems like everyone is just trying to do the best they can. (are not we all?)
I wish everyone who blogs about this family, would keep in mind that hurtful things that are being written, do have an impact. I hope some of the darksites will read this interview & remember that.
Anya@IW says: Pattypie was depressed? Say it isn’t so. I hope that’s temporary, as her levity is welcome and necessary on the Gosselin threads.
I never stay depressed for long. I find a good stiff scotch helps to lighten my mood as necessary.
just sayin’
But seriously – I always try not to take the Gosselin bloggin’ world too seriously. But I do worry for Kate and the kids. It drives my crazy when I see folks rubbing their hands with glee and saying “wait til the kids are old enough to talk, or write a book then Kate will get her comeuppance”. It’s like they are hoping the kids are having a horrible childhood so they dis Kate in the future. It’s my wish that those kids are having a great childhood and that their good times will far outweigh the bad and any talking or book writin’ that they do in the future is just a reflection of a happy life.
PattyPie said:
“It’s like they are hoping the kids are having a horrible childhood so they dis Kate in the future.”
Patty, exactly. It’s as if heaven forbid, the kids might actually be happy& really love their mother.
I’m going to put a link up to a post I put on my blog regarding this issue. I don’t normally put links up to my blog anymore because I respect the women here and they acknowledge me and have been very kind and respectful to me.
But I had some things I wanted to say regarding this, more so than I felt was appropriate to use their blog to say as I didn’t want to put IW in a rough position with Ellen by saying what I wanted to on IW. This way Ellen can hold only myself responsible for my words, NOT IW.
I agree with pattypie!! Ellen had no right to speak for the children, this is the oldest game in the divorce world. Pitting children agaisnt their own Mother and saying wait till they grow and can speak only tells me she and Jon are feeding crap to the kids. She is young, but at 23, she is an adult. Jon should love his children enough and care that Kate is taking good care of them, and denounce the hate sites that are destroying Kate and his children. If you want a cause Ellen, here’s one for you. Quit whining about the paps and move in a direction to love and protect Jon’s children. If you don’t like the spotlight, don’t date Jon, it’s rather very simple as Jon will always have the paps in his lifeas, he does love the attention. Hopefully, people who have posted here, help you understand that taking care of someone’s children has it’s up and downs, but in real life you can be their friend for now, not the parent.
I read your interviews days ago and thought it was nice that you were trying to bring some understanding to Ellens story with Jon. I didn’t comment as I had nothing to add, just thought it was nice that you interviewed her.
But this, and apparently I’ve missed the worst of it as somethings been deleted is just a shame. Is Ellen really going to attack Kate because she felt attacked ? That’s just so shameful and I doubt she even gets why.
I have to admit I am curious about what Ellen posted that was deleted. To me it appears as if it was specific allegations against Kate that she says the kids made. The problem is by putting that out there and then having it deleted, people are likely to imagine things much worse than what actually was.
There is very little worse than insinuation.
Ellen did not disclose anything the children told her or overheard. She did not breach any confidential talk. Stating that the kids have said things isn’t stating what they actually said. Ellen said (quote) “and as for the last comment…about him respecting the mother of his kids.. if ONLY you guys knew …….. i look at it froma neutral point of view..until certain things came out.. remember this.. kids arent stupid, they see things, they get treated certain ways and THEY TALK….” She did not say the children said anything negative and she definitely didn’t get specific. “Get treated certain ways” doesn’t tell us anything.
Maybe she did mean that the kids tell her they are treated badly, maybe not, but if they do I would think you’d be more concerned about how it affects the children than how this affects Kate.
Thank goodness Ellen didn’t get paid for this interview or you’d be accusing HER of exploiting the Gosselin children.
Love the dogs, but can’t help but think that Ellen is going to be another discarded soul mate left in the wake of Jon Gosselin. Don’t quite understand her saying he’s not a womanizer. She has to know about his past year+. Sorry, I get that she’s trying to give him the benefit of the doubt and probably thinks she is different than the others, but I hope this interview doesn’t end up stuck to Jons dresser w/a kitchen knife like the fake Hailey note. Will Ellen end up eating these words? Sad to say, but most likely. Stick with the cute, loyal dogs Ellen – the chi’s!
There has always been a lot of insinuation in the Gosselin world (Pennmommy, Not Aunt Julie), and I think that is one reason people reacted so strongly to what Ellen said.
Kids do complain about their parents, and as CoCoPuff said, when the parents are divorced they are going to complain about whichever one they are not with. If they actually complained about something serious, such as,oh,not being fed enough,or mom beating them with a spoon, then it would be Jon’s responsibility to do something about it. Otherwise, whatever “if only we knew” probably isn’t worth mentioning.
Stop reading into things. Ellen said “and as for the last comment…about him respecting the mother of his kids.. if ONLY you guys knew” Maybe she meant if you guys only knew how much respect he really has for her now. You don’t know what Ellen meant. It’s not clear and not very explanatory. There are no details. Stop reading into things. Kids are not stupid. They do see things and they do talk. We all know that. She didn’t go into details. She didn’t say anything negative and didn’t give details.
Ellen,
If you want people to stop reading things into what you are saying…my suggestion would be to stop saying anything. It appears that you are trying to back track and all that will accomplish is to dig yourself a deeper hole.
Adeline,
You tell us to stop reading into things, well you don’t know what her intent or meaning was either.
No she Never said that, but she implied it.
I’m sorry, I’ve re-read the comments numerous times. I did so before I posted about this on my own blog as the words hit me so, I wanted to feel certain I wasn’t reading into things that weren’t there. I re-read them again before putting this post up.
I stand by my belief that the words were meant as they were taken.
Quoting Paige “There is very little worse than insinuation.”
Wow, Eleen’s comments disappear around here faster then then a speeding bullet.
Ellen’s comments were removed at her request. Unlike blogger, we do not have a feature where an author can remove their own comment. Upon request by the author , we will remove a specific comment. We feel that is respectful and the right thing to do.
Ellen had her reasons for requesting this and personally I think we should respect her decision.
Ellen, if you can’t stand by your words, then stop saying them and then asking for them to be deleted. Asking for them to be deleted only makes things worse. And even if they are deleted here, there are never gone. You are tech savy enough to know that more us than us older folks.
In the words of your infamous boyfriend to his then very little boys, man up.
There are so many layers to this story.
Ellen did not like the way her comments were interpreted by readers. She asked that they be deleted so that they aren’t interpreted that way. IMO that means she acknowledges that the message received was all wrong and not her intent. Certainly, the spelling and grammar of her comments from her phone were of a different calibur from her emailed responses. They were obviously off the cuff. I think that’s where the problem occurred. It seemed like Ellen was implying that the kids will talk (badly, about their family/the show/their parents) one day. By asking that we delete the comments, she has acknowledged that wasn’t what she meant to say.
Her emailed answers were thought out. For that reason, I will give more weight to the interview.
I’m off to pour that good stiff scotch!
Ellen said:
and as for the last comment…about him respecting the mother of his kids.. if ONLY you guys knew …….. i look at it froma neutral point of view..until certain things came out.. remember this.. kids arent stupid, they see things, they get treated certain ways and THEY TALK…..
eventually the truth comes out..when those kids are old enough to understand all this crap… you just wait….. the things they are going to say…….
When I first read the above statements, I thought they were an insult to Kate but then I thought its probably because those words particularly “the truth comes out” and “just you wait” are (for me, anyway) tainted because of that cursed GWOP. I realized those are GWOP phrases that only mean one thing -Kate=evil. The words themselves are neutral, but used in the Gosselin blogging world have “read-between-the-lines” meaning attached. I am not sure if Ellen is aware that that’s how her words might have been interpreted when she said them. Maybe she just meant when the kids are old enough to talk about it, they will say that Jon did respect Kate and Jon is not as horrible a father as he is made out in the media. I don’t know what was deleted so maybe everything I just said is useless information but I just wanted to convey the idea of how GWOP (particulary those of use that have been involved in the Gosselin blogging world for a long time) can affect our interpretation of some words and phrases.
I personally want to thank Ellen again for doing this interview. She was respectful and thoughtful throughout the whole process and did not want to discuss the children or the family . I believe she became frustrated that the message she wanted to get across was not being heard and tried to express that in her comments.
We also need to remember that there are plenty of people that have read this interview and comments and have a different take on it than the people that have commented here.
Even though I am 55 I can remember being 23. It was much harder back then to sit back and listen to people discuss a loved one and keep quiet. I shared with Ellen in an email my thoughts. Do not have regrets. Learn from the experience and move on.
I agree with pattypie!! Ellen had no right to speak for the children, this is the oldest game in the divorce world. Pitting children agaisnt their own Mother and saying wait till they grow and can speak only tells me she and Jon are feeding crap to the kids. She is young, but at 23, she is an adult. Jon should love his children enough and care that Kate is taking good care of them, and denounce the hate sites that are destroying Kate and his children. If you want a cause Ellen, here’s one for you. Quit whining about the paps and move in a direction to love and protect Jon’s children. If you don’t like the spotlight, don’t date Jon, it’s rather very simple as Jon will always have the paps in his lifeas, he does love the attention. Hopefully, people who have posted here, help you understand that taking care of someone’s children has it’s up and downs, but in real life you can be their friend for now, not the parent.-justpoor
I appreciate that Ellen did the interview in the first place. She didn’t have to. But, dating Jon puts her in the spotlight. It’s a given and surely something she must’ve known when agreeing to do this interview. Also, just because she’s dating Jon, doesn’t mean she’s the end all of what is true. She’s a protector of Jon more so than the kids or Kate. She only hears Jon’s side (and let’s face it, that could certainly be lies or truth that is so stretched, well it could be lies). Just because she’s now a part of the Gosselin world, doesn’t mean what she’s saying (because it’s via her world with Jon) is the truth. So, the implications she wrote, that’s something she needs to take ownership of and either apologize or just be truthful and say, “you know, what I wrote, I see how it could’ve been misunderstood or implied and I didn’t mean that”. To not do that, leaves vague sentences that a few years from now, the kids see and will wonder or perhaps be hurt by them. It’s not about her. It’s always about the kids. That’s the bottom line she has to understand. If she’s with Jon, the best thing for her to do is be quiet publicly. Be the level headed one in that relationship. It would only help his reputation. Which brings me to my next thought….
She is young, but at 23, she is an adult. This is a loaded sentence. One I totally agree with, but loaded in the sense that she is an adult, but a 20 something does not have the empathy of a 30 or 40 year old. That’s the life experience that I was talking about . Maturity. She (and other 20 somethings) have to step back and observe, realize the world doesn’t revolve around them, and have empathy, understanding, and sympathy for fellow man. Yes, there are 20-somethings who do have empathy, and it most often is because they were given a dose of reality and humbled to appreciate what situations in life are and how one should treat others. They have come through situations with maturity and shown a level head of thought. Jon does not have empathy or maturity, if he did he would’ve been respectful of his kids’ mother in the first place. He would’ve understood that his actions of retaliation and intent to hurt their mother, was actually hurting them. That’s what I’m talking about. A level headed sense of what is right and wrong actions towards human beings. It’s about consequences. It’s about how to treat people with decency and humanity. It’s about taking ownership of doing what is right in terms of good behavior and being a good example of a human being with heart.
At first from reading the article, I thought “this just might be the gal that can help Jon through his crisis/horrid behavior”. She seemed level-headed and mature. However, after reading the rants of posts respsonding, I see that is not the case. I believe a big part of her being misunderstood is the style of response…writing from her phone….and the responses were not that of an intelligent 20 something, it was that of a defending 20 something using txt words and bad puncutation (granted, that might’ve been something her phone did in tranmission, the first time, I gave that the benefit of the doubt). After the 2nd or 3rd response, it was definitely the context and innuendo that showed me it was a 20-something without empathy who really does need to stop, think, and don’t say anything that you wouldn’t want the kids to see when they are old enough.
As for the respecting the mother of his children, I really think that is lost on her. An empathatic and sympathetic man and woman would understand what I mean. Once again, it is maturity. It’s not about “me”, it’s about “others”. Both she and Jon are lacking that. I hope together they develop that maturity. A poster wrote above that she had dated a man who had kids and now it is the wife (the poster) and the woman who are BFFS. Do you know why that is? Because that young woman (the girlfriend) didn’t have a shield over her eyes and had understanding , sympathy and empathy. She wasn’t selfish and understood the whole and big picture. (once again, not about “me” but about “others”).
I removed all comments but in her very last comment she did say that she never said ” that the kids said anything bad” “they never complain about anyone or anything to me.”
Sage,
Exactly. I don’t know EITHER, which means neither do any of you. She said her words weren’t being received how she meant them. Why can’t you all accept that. You are so unreasonable.
Kudos to the mods for being reasonable about this.
Hey wait just a a cotton pickin second!!! I do know everything! I know everything about everything.! That’s why I read here but don’t often post it’s because I am perfect and this site is for imperfect women and I am completely perfect …just sayin’
So if you ever want to know about anything just ask me – cuz baby I KNOW EVERYTHING!
Ellen seems like a nice girl – she is young ( and calling someone young is not a dirty word!) she got upset because she felt judged — that more than anything should help her to have empathy for the other folks in this situation (including Kate – Hailey and the rest) Like it or not she is now in a somewhat public relationship and she needs to choose her words carefully. Even if this relationship wasn’t semi-public she would still have to be careful choosing her words and actions because dating a man who has been divorced a few month and children is a tricky territory at the best of times. Her relationship with Jon is new and if it crumbles now that she is involved with the kids they too will feel the upheaval of another relationship gone wrong in their lives. In a nut shell dating a divorced Man with children is a big responsiblity.
“Just you wait and see”, no matter how you try to paint it – sounds like a threat.
Theresa -
Very eloquent. Agree with everything you said,except one. I just wished I could’ve put it as calmly as you did. What one ‘shoots from the hip’ with is more what the person really is and what they really think than having questions presented to them via e-mail and being able to take their time in answering and wording. What she shot from the hip with, with all due respect to Pam, I feel is what the true Ellen. She may be mature in some aspects, but clearly not in others. That isn’t a sin, nor is it something to be ‘held against her’. It is a fact of life & of age. Frankly, I don’t believe anyone gets a lick of sense until they reach 40!
What I saw is not only a backhanded slap at Kate through using her children to do so, but also statements what the haters would take to use to feel they had confirmation of all their accusations & claims against Kate. Which is exactly what it has done. Instead of just continuing to make off the hip comments saying that’s not what I meant, she should’ve sat down and wrote out a well thought out clarification. The fact that she choose to continue to shoot from the hip and then continued to ask for those comments to be deleted shows a lack of maturity & that she does not have a full understanding of what she got herself in the middle of when she started dating Jon. Not because of Jon being divorced, having eight kids and being a former media personality whose now infamous but still craves attention at all cost, but because of the man whom Jon is not but whom she believes he is. A man does not act like a fool publicly, not referring to in the comedic sense, and then be mature privately. If anything, it’s the opposite.
At times we’ve all hurt someone without intending to, not realizing the consequences of our actions and words until after the damage was done. Mature people acknowledge this, don’t try to weasel out of it, and still offer an apology for the unintended harm. Therefore, whether Ellen’s words were mis-taken or not, the harm was caused, the damage done, unintentional or not and I still feel a public apology to Kate is in high order.
The part I don’t agree with you is about Ellen doing this interview in the first place. She’s only been in Jon’s life a few months, after a string of others in an extremely short time for so many, been around the kids a limited amount of time. Had she been with Jon, say a year or become engaged to him within the year, then an interview would’ve been appropriate for her. Nothing at all in any shape or form against IW, nor their taking the interview, my problem with that is with Ellen. There was absolutely no point nor need, given the short time, for her to do an interview with anyone.
Welcome to new posters and readers.
So many good points! TeresaE. thanks for pointing out that we Gosselin bloggers bring a lot of hate site-experience to the thread. Unless Ellen has had the pleasure of having her comments rejected at Gwop, been lectured about supporting child abuse, been accused of sockpuppeting Kate herself, she probably didn’t realize the visceral response to those lines!
Theresa, ITA that 23 years old is very different from 46 years old. Great point. Pam is right that the best things to do with mistakes we make at 23, 46, or 85, is try to repair damage, learn a lesson, and move on.
Exactly, Patty, she put emphasis on it twice, once with as you said the ‘just you wait” and she also used the ‘remember this’ Out of respect for IW as they’ve deleted her comments, I won’t repost them but she used the emphasis both times in speaking of what the kids would speak of when the got older. And as Patty said, used in the context they were, sounded like a threat as well as an accusation. She would be issuing a threat such as this to Jon? She would be making such am implication at Jon? Of course not, therefore it is only left to deduct it was towards Kate.
I do not think, given Ellen’s words and her using and order of them that no anyone who took it as a backhanded slap at Kate using Kate’s kids are wrong in their preception, irregardless of if Ellen didn’t mean it that way, it sure as h sounded as of she did.
Back to the original interview–
One thing Ellen confirmed that is positive is that she and Jon “attend regular family get togethers such as birthdays and cookouts…” with his family. Jon’s family doesn’t speak out much. I think I remember that his mom defended him once in an interview, she posed for photos in Las Vegas with him, and his brother did a charity event with him. Personally, I completely understand why friends and family shun the attention. Jon and Kate are controversial! I’m glad Ellen shared as much as she did in the interview.
Kate’s family, too, has shown quiet support. Her mom’s and sister’s Facebook page for Kate’s Dancing with the Stars job, and now their support for her in general, is nice to see. Too often, we read “Where is the family or friends to support her?” I see how tricky it can be to support them! Both Jon and Kate do receive quiet support. Thanks to Ellen for sharing that.
Adeline, you state I am unreasonable? I responded to Ellen that if she wanted people to stop reading things into what she says…she needs to STOP saying the first thing that pops into her head. I would call that Sage advice.
I’ve got an idea, perhaps before the next interview of anyone Gosselin related you should hand out a GWOPESE dictionary…it might help prevent some things getting lost in translation
Good catch on that btw Theresa, it is a trigger phrase for alot of us.
One thing that I did find very interesting about Ellen’s comments last night, her discription of the paps & how easily the pictures they take can be misinterpreted. I still wish there was something more that could be done about those vultures, I was SO happy to hear about the trees, the kids should be able to play in their own yard in peace.
But Ellen failed to mention, and wonder if she is aware, Jon alerts the paps to these opportunities and makes money off of them. Even our buddy, good old Al in his potential Pulitzer prize winning book, acknowledged that. What I do believe is that the paps delibertly misrepresent many of the photos, including those of Kate.
This young woman has a boyfriend!!!! She is exactly like every young girl who gets a boyfriend, he is the be all and end all of her life so of course she wants and thinks he is her knight in shining armour and nothing you or I or anyone thinks will deter her from his side. Since this relationship with Jon is new and still fresh neutrality is non-existant.
I remember my first knight and his oh so shining armour. My friends and parents distain for him didn’t change my mind in the least. His armour quickly started to tarnish after a few months and that made the blinders come off.
When Ellen’s blinders come off she might come to the realization that there is more than one side to every story. Jon’s side is apparently keeping his armour shiny.
The part I don’t agree with you is about Ellen doing this interview in the first place. She’s only been in Jon’s life a few months, after a string of others in an extremely short time for so many, been around the kids a limited amount of time. Had she been with Jon, say a year or become engaged to him within the year, then an interview would’ve been appropriate for her. Nothing at all in any shape or form against IW, nor their taking the interview, my problem with that is with Ellen. There was absolutely no point nor need, given the short time, for her to do an interview with anyone.-Ziggy
Ziggy you’ve got a great point! You know, when I said I appreciate Ellen did the interview in the first place, when I wrote that sentence I wanted Ellen to realize that we weren’t really attacking her in any way and that doing the interview in a forum like IW, where it is probably the most respective, especially from our mods, was appreciated, that she chose to talk with our mods not a rag or hate site.
But I totally see your point and I agree with you. Perhaps best she declined and when actually being in the lives of Jon and the kids in a permanent role, then maybe an interview/it would be more appropriate then, if appropriate at all.
I think Ellen just learned a valuable lesson. The blogs are not for the weak at heart.
I really do wish her and Jon the best. I wish she wouldn’t have deleted her last comment. If she didn’t mean it to sound the way it did she should have just left that last comment and been done with it.
I hope all the Gosselins find peace and happiness.
Sheesch, that went well ! LOL,
After careful thought today and reading the other posts, it still upsets me to think that Ellen may have been trying to tell everyone that she has dirt on Kate or Jon if need be. Please Ellen, for the sake of the children, please don’t repeat what Jon or the children ever say to you. The old saying is, “If you can hold your head up and smile, you are unique in todays world”
I also want her to know, that respect for Kate will help the bridge happiness for Jon and the kids. Yes, she is young, but she knew going into this relationship, Jon had 8 kids and for the next 20 years, he will have to be there for his kids, supporting them through college. That will be a tough road for anyone to have to endure. If Jon can turn his life around, get a job and a home for his children to be comfortable in, I say good luck to both of you. Sitting on a mountain with a life coach would not be my idea of someone who is going forward, just using another excuse in life. Let Kate and Jon make decisions for their children, and quietly accept what they say.
I liked the interview particularly the questions about what attracted Ellen to Jon and how Jon excels as a father. It is nice to hear a different (as in non-tabloid) opinion about Jon from someone who knows him personally.
She said that sometimes she lets what other people say get to her and that is obvious from what happened here. Hopefully, she will see this as an opportunity to work on that and not get bitter and angry as I think a lot of people would. I agree with JulieAnn. The blogs are definitely not for the weak at heart. (not saying Ellen is a wimp)
IW is the only blog I know that has gotten interviews with Ellen and Jon and has Kate’s mom and sister sometimes commenting. I hope that other Gosselin family and friends are not discouraged from giving IW interviews. The mods could have easily rejected comments that were critical of Ellen but, IMO, that would have made it too (pardon the expression) ass kissy. So I commend them for first getting the interview, allowing all? comments and respecting Ellen’s decision to delete some of her posts.
Teresa ITA, great job IW!
Thank you Teresa. Yes all comments were posted.
Kate’s mom and sister are supporters of Kate and supporters and friends of Imperfect Women. They will not be giving interviews. Can you see why? LOL
Although I still have issue with how much Ellen really did understand the meaning of her words, and still fully stand behind my opinion that Ellen owes Kate a public apology,
I agree and support IW’s choice to delete her comments at her request. That is the right thing to do. It is the responsible and ethical thing to do and shows the integrity of IW.
There must be someone here that can contribute one good story to our Wedding Mishaps post?
Ellen should respect Kate Oh, please. Kate should have respect for Ellen, Jodi and Kevin and stop throwing them and Jon under the bus.
Kate has shown zero respect for Jon, so think about that… Ellen is not naive and shallow, so please leave her be.
I’ll say it again, ate has no respect for anybody, including Jon. Ellen does not owe anybody anything.
I figured these would show up in the middle of the night/very early morning hours.
Why don’t you come to my blog and say these things there? Why don’t you use the e-mail contact I have right on my front page and say that to me directly? I have written much more about my feelings about it one my blog than I have here. You people have run into the wrong person if you think you can bully/scare me down. I have just as much right not to allow hate Kate on my blog as you do to not allow pro-Kate on your blog. And for your info, if you really paid attention to my blog, you would see that when someone presents themselves a reasonable mature intelligent beings presenting an argument against Kate, I have given them the opportunity to voice their opinions – but I have also gone head to head with them about the facts. They always leave of their own accord because their argument against Kate can’t stand up when the argument is based on facts, and not wild accusations and speculations.
What people who speak against Kate post on my blog they do so as they’ve done here, in the wee hours and post just hate talk and garbage.
I will not fight on this board, if you want a fight, bring it to mine. I’ll allow you and go head to head with you as long as you stick to known facts and not your wild, silly, unfounded accusations. But as you made comments against me and about me here, I have the right to speak up for myself here. I will post this in regards to you ‘people owe Ellen an apology’, then I will offer nothing else to you here. I will address it on my blog.
Those who do nothing but bash Kate and spread lies about her, when they offer Kate a public apology, I will offer Jon one. What I have written about Jon is facts published & confirmed & my opinion. I don’t post wild speculations about him, I don’t make up things about him & try to pass them off as proven fact.
What you write about Kate is fabrication and speculation. Like it or not, Kate is those children’s mother and Ellen had no business insinuating anything against Kate, period. Ellen is not even their step-mother. She is not even engaged to Jon. If Ellen has any issues regarding of how Kate cares for her children, then she should be mature about it, not taking cheap swipes on a blog which gave her the freedom to speak. Ellen should privately go to the authorities. Otherwise, she needs to just keep off of Kate.
Ellen herself choose to speak out of her own free will and put her self publicly in the middle then when she was called on her words and held accountable, she wanted everything deleted & claimed that isn’t what she meant after she emphasized it twice.
Ellen may have a right to speak up for herself and Jon but she has no right, none, period to insinuate anything against Kate. And regardless of how she tries to wiggle out of it that’s what she did and I wasn’t the only one saw what her words meant and nor was I the only one who was took offense by them. I’m just the most outspoken out it. As for Jon, Ellen and JoKe, Kate is the ONLY one who gets off her butt and goes through the hell they create for her to provide for her children. All the rest of them do is run their mouths against Kate, then go crawl under a rock when they get backlash. Not as single one of them, not even Jon has the balls to stand up and provide and care for the those kids. Jon already proved he can’t & won’t. So when the playing field is equal on that account, then they can say what they want about Kate and I’ll keep my mouth shut about what they say.
So if you want a fight, bring it – on my board.
Ladies, at IW, I do apologize to you. I wil no longer address this here.
Kate has never said anything that shows Ellen disrespect. As for Jodi and Kevin, as soon as they went to Radar on Line and spread rumors that Jon told them, they lost all right to expect respect from Kate. And while I think both Jon and Kate should show each other respect for the childen’s sake, Jon has shown Kate no respect. It goes two ways.
Ellen should model Beth Carson’s behavior.
Yikes! I think it might be time to lighten up a little. I admit to coming in late on this, but I didn’t see anything that horrible. I think the comments Ellen made are just a blip on the radar (or radaronline
). She might be venting some frustration about things that she sees as unfair to Jon. I don’t think in the vast cyberworld of information about their parents, that this will stand out to the Gosselin children. They are no different than any other children of celebrities. They know and love the real people that are their parents, not the caricatures that the press make them. Kate does take a lot of awful talk about her, but I stand by my premise, that her success is related to it. If Kate’s success was dependent on her fans alone, she would not have nearly the coverage she has. Those who hate Kate Gosselin have been instrumental in her becoming the celebrity that she is. I think that is the greatest irony. I think Ellen did learn a good lesson. Any interview about the Gosselins is going to stir up a hornet’s nest.
.
Pam, I’m sorry…my wedding day was without mishap
I think it was good interview. It was interesting, it was Ellen’s COMMENTS after the interview that became the controversy.
Ziggy, I just read your comment # 103 ~WOW
ITA and you go girl!
What great restraint, IW! Many insightful comments from imperfect women who ‘met’ a young girl (Ellen). There’s no way to put this genie back in the bottle, but do I ever agree…you had a very kind & reasoned Q & A with another one of Jon’s youthful women. However, I wish Ellen had decided NOT to become a part of this raging public drama! Jon’s own life coach had already praised Ellen, Jon & their relationship w. the 8. (Another spokesperson was enough to make my stomach churn.) I DO doubt Ellen’s quest to be normal vs. Jon’s intention to be relevent in this fame game. Why would he announce - via Twitter - that he’d keep his fans up-dated? From what I’ve heard, he has.
Yes, I do respect the path Kate has chosen. I see an imperfect mother doing her level best to create as PERFECT a life as one can, given the circumstances, for 8 unique children. Jon (& yes, Ellen) should thank their lucky stars they have nothing better to do than worry about themselves.
I think Ellen needs to pull up to her computer and plug Jons name into youtube… sit there and watch actual footage of HIM and what has come directly out of HIS mouth over the past year plus. I’ll watch a rerun of old J&K+8 and get wishy washy, “awww, the old Jon”. Then I took a stroll down memory lane of him this past year and couldn’t believe how much I already forgot because he would top every awful thing he did or said with something worse – almost daily for a while there. From the formal interviews to the snatches of film at ‘the fence’ , to his rants in parking lots, airports, talk shows, rag mags - anyone who would listen. One lie right after another. Not to mention the lies and ignorance spewing from Heller and the other company Jon kept. It’s all there. Listen and learn Ellen. Not to say that people can’t change, but there sure are a lot of people who trusted and believed they were different and Jon would never do that to them… Their stories are there also, them defending him – then later being burned by him. Ellen, don’t end up in an airport hotel in a boxing match against Jons other soul mates…
As for the comments, if they were a mistake, the solution is to clarify, retract, or delete. That’s been done.~Ann
I agree w/Ann.
I was surprised by Ellen’s comments, but we’ve all said things we regret. It’s in that moment of time and we can’t go back to make it not have happened. We can only go forward and learn from it. Ellen had said that her comments weren’t coming out right, She asked that they be deleted. I’m not willing to judge her entire persona or attitude based what she said here. Unless she shows up on ROL w/stories of the children and Kate or twitters about Katezilla as Haily did, I’m of the opinion that it should be a viewed as a mistake that was retracted.
Why all the Ellen hate? Do you bash Kate when she feigns interest in someone or talks about dating? Or is away from the children? Or complains day after day about being away from the children she deliberately brought into this world?
She’s so utterly intoxicated with her own pseudo-celebrity, especially now that she’s on the cusp of her ultimate fifteen minutes of fame, she practically needs to be taken to the ER to get her stomach pumped.
Neither Jon nor Kate are good parents. Give it up already.
Charlie Rose, last time I checked the focus of this piece was on Ellen, not Kate. I find it interesting that you are so full of venom at Kate that you have spread it in a thread that isn’t even devoted to her.
BTW, no Ellen hate from me. I have said a number of times (as have many posters) that she appears to be a lovely, grounded young woman with many great qualities.
BTW, no Ellen hate from me. I have said a number of times (as have many posters) that she appears to be a lovely, grounded young woman with many great qualities.
I second that.
Wow for people who are imperfect you all sure do throw a lot of stones.
Kate has made her own bed. I defend what I said about her.
My comment was about Ellen followed up by Kate’s narcissist behavior. Take it for what it is. Either way, you are going to tear me a new one because I don’t agree with your holier than idea of Kate.
Why would we bash Kate for talking about dating? She is divorced after all.
Nobody commented on Ellen’s toes or her cleavage. I think she got off pretty easy.
No hate for Ellen OR Kate from me.
I don’t bash either, it’s not like they’re Mel Gibson.
Well this has turned into a fine hullabaloo for sure. Many very verbal and excellent points and viewpoints have been pondered with strong feelings and emotions. Should this be “Ellengate” in the Gosselin blogging world?
I have tried to be neutral as Ellen asked in that “do as I say, not as I do” way, so here is my take on this hullabaloo in case anyone is interested. If Ellen does any kind of reflections on what has transpired and tries to make a rational judgement then she just might have light bulbs popping off in her head with a revelation that WOW! this is exactly what Kate goes through on a daily basis. Enough said.
I posted on wedding mishaps.
I want to start off by saying I an a Kate supporter and that I think Ellen was misunderstood. She doesn’t know about the Gosselin bloggin world. My take on the whole thing is she was trying to defend herself and it came out all wrong. It was easy for us to read into her comments that she was bashing Kate but I don’t think she was. I think she was just defending her position regarding the children, her showing up at Kate’s house and her relationship with Jon.
She is young and there is nothing wrong with that. I don’t think anything she has experienced in life has prepared her for life with Jon and the media. Its still early love and only time will tell. IMO if Jon has not told her the truth about anything she is smart enough to figure it out in time.
The way she has been treated bothers me the same way it bothers me the way Kate is treated.
Again I don’t think it was her intent to bash Kate only to defend herself and it came out all wrong. I feel bad for her.
Lindsey,
Thanks, I read it and I loved what your Dad did. That was so cute.
Deborah,
I agree with your post and thank you for saying that.
Just for claraifcation, I said I wouldn’t fight with the haters here, I didn’t say I wouldn’t post. And apologized to IW for my one ‘coming back’ at the haters here. I only did so here the one time, as they directly came at me here.
I would like to try to explain myself hopefully more clearly about my stance regarding Ellen’s off the cuff remarks and why I reacted to them the way I did.
I think it is unrealistic to think that Ellen doesn’t have a clue about the blogging world regarding Kate.
Ellen hasn’t lived under a rock until she met Jon. She may not be very familiar in depth with the hate Kate movement, but to think she is unaware of it at all is doubtful. The fact that she did an interview here, a blog where there is much talk about Kate, many supporters of Kate and talk about the the Kate haters shows that she isn’t unfamiliar with it. She did NOT walk into the interview here and post her later comments totally blind and unaware of what she was doing. Ellen may be naive in the complexity of what’s she’s gotten herself into regarding Jon, but she’s not dumb by any means. She may not have understood the complexity, but she KNEW she was getting herself in the middle of a highly public, highly controversial relationship. She is also young, and being young she is very idealist. Thank heavens for the young and their idealism! It keeps the world moving forward. But to excuse everything simply because she is young just doesn’t wash with me. She’s young, but she’s not THAT young. She’s been out the world, etc. She hasn’t lived under a rock. Also as a young person, Ellen is very familiar with blogs, internet postings, posting by texting, etc. I will give open to the possibility that it wasn’t coming accross the way she wanted and didn’t mean it as it came accross. But one of my point is she kept posting and then asking for it to be deleted. Though it was deleted here, it didn’t stop the haters from taking her words, post interview, even though deleted here, and basically using them to claim confirmation about their claims against Kate & running with it.
Had Ellen’s remarks beyond the initial interview, once they had been deleted here, been able to be the end of it, that would’ve suited me fine. But wasn’t, even if I nor anyone else ever said another word about it. It’s not the reprecussions of her words here, it’s the reprecussions elsewhere, the haters sites. They’ve bit into her remarks like ants to honey. Her remarks even though deleted didn’t STOP the reprecussions of her remarks on the haters site. It’s NOT as simple as she mis-spoke, it’s deleted and it’s done & over. Even if it’s never spoken of here again or on my blog, it’s NOT done, it’s NOT gone.
THAT is why I asked for an apology, or at least further explanation. Ellen is capable of expressing herself very well when she has the time to think over what she wants to say. That’s fine. Some people are not good fast on their feet thinkers. Nothing wrong with that, no critizism there. But IW would’ve been willing to post up a thoughtful explanation from Ellen clarifying her off the cuff remarks.
I’m not trying to presumptious in stating what I feel IW would post. IW goes out of their way to give a fair shake. They posted Ellen’s beyond the interview remarks, and as Ellen felt those weren’t coming out as she wanted, I feel it safe to assume IW would’ve posted a thoughtful explanation from Ellen.
It may not have been Ellen’s intention to cause harm towards Kate. But whether intended or not, the fact of the matter is she did. My stance is when one causes harm, most especially if unintended, that person has the responsibilty to correct that harm.
I too wish she would email the fine ladies here and set things straight.
I read everything as it was happening like you Zig and I do understand how you feel, really I do. I wished at the time that instead of attacking someone would have asked in a calm fashion to please explain herself better.
Watching her being bashed was no different for me than watching what the haterz do to Kate.
I can’t help the way I feel Zig. Please don’t take it personal, most all the people I blog with feel the same as you and I consider them my friends, I hope the way I feel doesn’t change that.
Peace & Aloha
Deb, no, I don’t take it personnal. Not at all. And I’ll admit I came off pretty strong. I just knew when I saw those remarks, what would happen. I kept thinking in my mind, NO, ELLEN, NO, STOP! Not in a negative way towards Ellen at all. She came over very well in her interview and although I will admit I still have serious questions and doubts about her intentions regarding her off the cuff remarks, & her reasons for being with Jon given his past, I will say I thought more of her after the interview. Although her constant remarking how the kids loved her, etc. bothered me some. Her interview refusing to discuss other things did impress me a bit.
I will take a bit of expection that I bashed Ellen like the haters bash Kate. I came on strong, but I didn’t do as they do. I didn’t attack her personnal looks or anything of that nature as they do Kate. I didn’t call her names as they do Kate. I didn’t deny that she had/has the right to defend herself and Jon. Being accused by someone I consider an on-line friend of bashing Ellen as the haters bash Kate does hurt a bit, but I”m a big girl. I know the haters say that, and I could give a rats butt about what they say or think of me, but a friend, yeah , that stings a bit. Even this old tough lady has a few soft spots left. : )
Zig, I’m so sorry, maybe it was just the way I felt she got ganged up on. Not any one person. I love all of you. You are my blog sisters. Please replace the sting with a kiss. PLEASE !!!!!!
This is the first I’ve posted for awhile. I do understand how you all feel. I should not have said that about the haterz. I just felt so helpless.
Deborah-
>>Watching her being bashed was no different for me than watching what the haterz do to Kate.
I can’t help the way I feel Zig. Please don’t take it personal, most all the people I blog with feel the same as you and I consider them my friends, I hope the way I feel doesn’t change that.<<
We’re not supposed to take personally being put on the same footing as the haterz ?!?!?! To me, that IS a personal insult & it’s not even accurate.
Ellen received a respectful and extremely friendly reception here. The most that was initially questioned was some discussion over whether the cell phone photo with Joel on the rail indicated a specific instance where not enough attention was being paid. She reacted angrily and then made those remarks about the kids would say As much as she tried to create doubt later, I didn’t and others didn’t find anything ambiguous about the initial remarks and those remarks are being used against Kate on hater sites.
I am not sure how else one can reasonably take those statements as other than Ellen was implying that the kids have been saying bad things about their mother when she says: “and as for the last comment…about him respecting the mother of his kids.. if ONLY you guys knew …….. i look at it froma neutral point of view..until certain things came out.. remember this.. kids arent stupid, they see things, they get treated certain ways and THEY TALK….. eventually the truth comes out..when those kids are old enough to understand all this crap… you just wait….. the things they are going to say……. ” [Emphasis added except for the all caps] Many of us were taken aback by these remarks.
Kate is bashed for things beyond her control, for not meeting standards that total strangers feel they have the right to set for her, for things that have been repeatedly demonstrated to be lies. She’s been called evil, a monster, every sexual slur imaginable. People have sent her death threats. I don’t think Ellen being challenged on a remark that is inappropriate, especially coming from the rather new girlfriend of a divorced father, and having her judgment questioned on chosing to make such a remark even if she later tried to explain it away is even remotely comparable .
If you find ambiguity in Ellen’s original statements about what the kids are going to say, that is your right regardless of whether or not I can’t see the ambiguity or any need to ask her to explain further. However, to compare Ellen being challenged to the haterz’ vendetta against Kate is insulting and hurtful to those of us who were simply trying to respectfully express our reaction to her remarks.
Deborah-I didn’t see your response to Ziggy until after I posted my response. I accept your explanation.
Thank you Peggy.
♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥
Again, I’m sorry. I should not have said it that way.
Wow, another day in Ellen’s world. If I had the haters on my back like Kate and her children do, I would want to crawl under a rock. Instead, Kate has moved forward, supporting her kids, and working hard. If Ellen just would have had one kind word about Kate in her whole interview, I think the public would have thought different about her. Ellen’s friends early on in her relationship with Jon, posted on the net that Ellen wanted fame, and was using Jon to get it. It’s sad that people want to use Jon for their own gain, but Jon is using them for his name to stay out in the limelight. Ellen, if you are reading the posts, just tell Jon, no ne hates him, but he needs to step up and get a job and be responsible. He has an adorable family with many happy years ahead of them all. I do think you owe Kate an apology, IMO.
Deb, As long as you aren’t equating myself and others who questioned Ellen with the haters. That was a pretty rough rough & unfair comparison, I felt. But we explained and you explained, neither walked away without explaning themselves, so it’s all good with me.
See how simple that was to solve with explanations?
I feel I need to claify another statement I made. Ellen and Jon have the right t be with whomever they choose, period. I just wonder why a young lady who evidently has some smarts would go for someone with Jon’s rep & track record with so much publicity he continuualy goes for.
As Peggy said, it’s pretty hard to take Ellen’s post interview words as anything other than they way they read. Any way you cut it, those are some pretty cutting implications. And I kept wondering if that’s not what she meant, then what did she mean?
The damage has been done. Had Ellen, as I’d hoped, come out with some clarifing statement, a a public apology to Kate, something of a positive nature, regardless of how short, yesterday, I think it may have helped the damaged caused some. But at this point, even if Ellen would give a statement, it wouldn’t hold water with the haters – they would just say she did so to keep us from bashing her and/or that she was pressured into it. So I really thinks that’s a ship which has sailed. Sadly. For both Kate and Ellen. But as someone said, maybe it will give Ellen a view of what Kate deals with everyday. I’m sorry more was given to the haterz at Kates expense.
Also, if Ellen is going to be in Jon’s life, and to all young women who date men with children from a previous relationship, whether you agree with the mother, approve of her (short of TRULY abusive and TRULY negectful behavior) or not, you MUST understand that woman is the childrens’ mother. Nothing you can ever say or do, nothing the father can ever say or do can change that. The children you came to love, those are her children and she is a major player in making them the children you claim to love. Do not ever forget that fact or discount it. To do so is the biggest mistake you can make.
At the end of the day, you walk away, her kids are hers forever, all the problems, everything, 24/7/365. Your short time with them does not even come close to equate with her time with them. Not meaning in the form of how much time.
Being the new woman in the midst is a difficult postion under the best of circumstances. For the benefit of the children involved, the benefit of your significant other, the benefit of yourself, the WORSE thing you can do is do anything which alienates that mother even further. You must show her respect, even if you don’t feel she deserves it. You MUST respect HER space as HERS, not formally THEIRS even if your significant other thinks so and encourages you in that. You have boundaries and you need to stay inside of them unless and until you develope a good relationship with her. And you stand a far better chance of doing so by the things I’ve said above. And you never, never, never even hint at anything negative about her to anyone to whom it has even the slightest potential of getting back to her. In this case, of getting into the public.
I have been on both sides of the fence, a stepmother and a divorced mothe who see her kids off with their father and someone else, putting my kids in their care. Both sides of the fence is a tough road to go, that’s for sure.
Justpoor, Yes I agree. Ellen’s not going to gain anything by following Jon’s road of bashing Kate. Not in the public eye nor with Kate. All she will gain is the support of the haters.
That certainly hasn’t helped Jon much, has it?
A bit more clarafication of my statements regarding a new person in the mix which I didn’t feel I made clear. It’s not about HER, the mother, it really isn’t. It’s hard to explain. She wants to feel that her kids are in good hands and part of feeling they are in good hands is feeling that is knowing that they are with someone who has good moral character and part of showing good moral character is the way the new one in the mix reacts to the mother. I wished I could explain it better. Drat.
I agree with everything you said Zig.
At first I read the “just wait kids talk” just like you all did, then in the deleted comments I saw something else. Maybe I just wanted to see something else. I just like you just wanted her to STOP and think about what she was saying.
I still think she didn’t use her words correctly, I didn’t either. Thank you for forgiving me.
No problem, Deb. We ALL do that from time to time, especially when we feel strongly about something. But this little burp proves my point I having been trying to make. (I’m a firm believer everything happens for a reason!)
If you feel it’s misunderstood, you just don’t walk away from it leaving it standing as misunderstood & then feel insulted that you were misunderstood. It’s one thing to try your best to clarify yourself and it still being misunderstood despite your efforts. It’s quite another to just walk away without any effort to clarify. To me that implies that what you say was misunderstood really wasnt misunderstood at all, you just don’t know the way to wiggle yourself of it.
At some point in all of our lives, we have to realize that there are consequences to pay in our life–both good and bad consequences. I realize that Ellen is young, but she ran her mouth before her brain, and the consequences for that faux pas, will haunt her for a long time to come. A public apology is the only way to right this unfortunate situation if she wants to be known as a woman of integrity….
Ziggy is a straight shooter–she is a woman of integrity and compassion, and she walks her talk!
I consider Ziggy to be a very supportive and thoughtful, and she has advised me on many issues regarding my husband’s care–he’s recuperating from a life-threatening infection and surgery–she has been an invaluable source of information on many issues, and I feel so fortunate to call her my friend….God bless you, Ziggy!
Aw, Sheryl, Thank you. (severly blushing) I do try to give the benefit of the doubt, I really do. But I’m also a strong believer in one being held accountable for their own actions and words. There are certain things which can be excused/overlooked because of youth, but there are other things where it’s just an excuse to escape responsibility.
I will happily accept you God blessing. I can use all I can get! LOL I get really worked up about what I feel strongly about and I feel very, very strongly about internet bashing affecting ones real life. Sometimes I come out rougher sounding that I intend to. The one point with Ellen that I did come out rough and don’t back down on, is she walked into the interview in full naiviety re blogs, on-line communication. & the impact they can have.
I have found those who post here are a very, very, very fair and compassionate group. Those who run this blog above reproach. Ellen was getting a fair shake. She stuck her foot in her mouth, and was being asked for, legimately and fairly so, I feel, explanation. I was willing to accept a reasonable explanation, not a BS one, though. It bothers me that she walked away from it without. I am telling myself maybe at that point, she just was scared to say anymore for fear of making it worse. Honestly, I”m ony buying what I’m telling myself 50/50. LOL
She got a really fair reception here to her initial interview.
But as I said earlier, the ship has sailed. The damage to Kate has been done. Anything from Ellen now wouldn’t have that much, if any impact on that aspect of it. It would help Ellen. I had so hoped when I finally got on the computer today, there would be something postive from her. But clearly it’s not gonna happen, so I guess it’s time to just move on from it and will do so even though I still feel she owes Kate an apology.
Deb, one more thing regarding this, and I’m really intersted to know as it may give me a different view point to consider, what did you see in which you refer to ‘then I saw something else?”
Deborah-I think Ellen could learn a lot from how you handled the response to your post.
Thank You Peggy.
We just don’t know if at the time Jon was with her telling her what to say or really what was going on with her. That maybe if we didn’t jump to conclusions maybe she would have stayed around.
I did get out of it she wanted it to be about her, not Jon or Kate. IMO she might have been feeling just as defensive about her position as we are about Kate.
I also believe that in the glow of new love we often are blind and I can forgive her for that.
Maybe after thinking about it she will clear things up for us.
Deb, I wondered too if Jon was with her telling her what to say. I also wondered if Jon might have been the one doing the actual ‘post interview’ postings. I will give this, the tone of the post interivew postings had a very different tone to them than the interview. That also could’ve been as she was being questioned about the pic at the game, she might have felt defensive. I thought those questions, given the pic, were fair. There just seemed to be a huge disconnect between the interview and the post interview postings.
Peg, I too think a lesson is t be had from how Deb handled the responses, particularly mine. Deb felt as strongly about her feelings as I did mine. I admire people who stand up for their convictions and stand up for themselves, but there is a proper way to do it, as Deb did. Deb is a quality person. As is Sheryl. She’s the best!
Deb, I’d have to read back, but didn’t we at the time ask, well if she didn’t mean that what did she mean? I don’t think any of us intended to be ‘mean’ to her, we’ve seen enough of that happen to Kate. I think we were just sort of stunned at Ellen’s remarks & taken back by them. We instinctively understood the repercussions it was going to cause beyond Ellen. For myself, I so wanted something FAST not only to stop the repercussions, but also for Ellen to redeem herself. I think nothing better could happen to the kids than their father being with a good woman and after reading her interview, although there were things which still nagged at me, I thought a bit better of her than I had before the interview but her post interview remarks not only blew it for me, it made me think even less of her than before. But I do see your point, Deb.
I, too, got the impression Ellen wanted it to be about her, not Jon or Kate. But she needs to understand the attention to her is because of Jon and the attention to Jon is because of Kate and the kids, not because of Jon himself. He blew that one totally on his own. So far I have seen nothing from Ellen that without Jon would make her noteworthy. This is NOT an insult or back handed swipe at Ellen.
Deb, I too wondered if Jon was ‘coaching’ her re the post interview posts. I even wondered if it was actually Jon who wrote those posts. There is no question there was a difference between the interview and the posts. But I didn’t discount her feeling defensive. I just don’t know what to think other than not too positive about Ellen right now.
I agree in about the in the glow of new love. It’s a woman’s nature to want to believe nothing but the best about their love and to excuse many things and to not show any doubts about that person to others.
Look at how many years Kate stood by Jon. His flaky behavior just didn’t start because of or until the show or the 6. He had been fired from jobs before that. He has a history of being flaky.
didn’t mean to more or less double post, didn’ t think the first one went through.
Who needs Dr. Phil or an Oprah, when there is more wisdom here on IW! The passion & compassion is palpable on a flat screen! Perhaps, just PERHAPS, Ellen will have read what I just did, & she’ll have a light bulb moment/s.
Last night I had one of those wonderful events, as a parent, to be w. our happily married daughter, granddaughter, & son - on the cusp of making the marriage ‘plunge’! Well into their 30′s, they still can’t thank me & their Dad enough for the lessons learned ( both good & bad) harkening back to their early childhood. Our children are older than Kate & Jon. It’s unimaginable wrapping my own head around the abject hatred that has ensued once this very public marriage began falling apart. To witness how Mom-Kate has forged ahead & just how difficult a time Jon is having…to me it’s heart breaking to KNOW their 8 will forever be changed because of life’s lottery.
Enter Ellen & again, the whole dynamics is different. If events reported are indeed true, Jon moved closer to his children w. Ellen already in his life. Had Jon’s ‘life coach’ been worthy of her reputation, I’d think the 1st thing said is HONOR your children’s mother, no matter what! Ellen, in all her 24 yr. old ‘wisdom’, should NOT have a public voice…not yet! ‘Jon is going thru’ 6 mos. of LEARNING how to be a better father, son, brother, boyfriend’ etc. Obvious to me, was in answering IW’s courteous Q & A’s, Ellen already delights in the attention she is getting. Her trying to keep on explaining away her off-the-cuff, fighting words ARE a huge window into her own immaturity & yes, her soul.
Ziggy, an apology from Ellen is something that would ring hollow now. The IW ladies have shown her a snapshot of what it’s like to ride the historic storm that is Gosselin, but with a whole lot more grace & wisdom.
Ziggy,
I’m replying to you question without the deleted comments to refer to just my memory of them and what I read into them. She talked about the pap pictures and how they take a second of life time and build a story behind them. If they were just pictures of normal life there would be no value to the article being written. Hence the pictures of them on their phones at the ball game. In regard to Jon not respecting Kate, maybe she was saying he does. That Kate was fine about her being with Jon when he was dropping off the kids. The picture of what appeared to be a spat between Jon and Kate in the street was nothing more than than a second of a convo ( we all know how animated Kate can get ) Jon and Kate have always been snippy with each other and that is the norm for them.
I think what she was trying to say is that when the kids grow up and talk about her being in their lives that she was a benefit to them and added to the quality of their time with dad.
That we don’t know the family and things are not what the pap pictures and articles about the family should be believed, that they are just made up story’s based around a pap picture.
If I’m wrong about the “just wait the kids will talk” and she said it the way it was taken by everyone I’m falling back on what Pattypie said, ” didn’t Hailey say the same thing and look what happen to her” ………LOL
Oh my.
I’m the absentee imperfect woman- weeks away from a new addition to our family. I just wanted to chime in and get back to the actual interview for a moment. Great job Anya. The questions were fair and respectful as was Ellen’s treatment by all of our admins.
After that things certainly went off the rails. We’ve all said things we wish we could take back and I think that’s what happened here. Mistakes are made by all of us on the daily…. hence the name of the site. The comments were removed from this site, but thanks to good old copy and paste they are present elsewhere. I understand the feelings those statements brought out in every one, on both sides, but I think they’ve been blown way out of proportion. I doubt Kate is losing any sleep, she faces far worse in the media every day. I’m going to be honest and duck- I think that sometimes the more adamant Kate defenders, though well meaning, can go too far.
I appreciate Ellen speaking with our site and I’m proud of my Imperfect Women. Those involved handled the situation with integrity. The fallout wasn’t caused or encouraged by our admins. In a few weeks this will be forgotten and there will be a new hot topic in the ever evolving Gosselin world.
Again- great job to Anya and all those involved.
I appreciate the discussion about Ellen’ comments.
I think we would all agree she was emotional when she posted, and she felt she was unfairly criticized about a picture.
Ziggy, you wrote, “THAT is why I asked for an apology, or at least further explanation.” in comment #121. In fairness, I want to call your attention to Pam’s comment #80 where she included part of Ellen’s explanation:
“I removed all comments but in her very last comment she did say that she never said ‘that the kids said anything bad’ ‘they never complain about anyone or anything to me.’ “
IMO Ellen did try to clarify. She specifically wrote that the kids said nothing bad to her. That is supportive of the kids’ relationship with Kate. The original comment is not here because it is part of what was deleted.
Deborah, I agree much of what you’ve written. In comment #138 you suggest “That maybe if we didn’t jump to conclusions maybe she would have stayed around” to give a better more positive clarification. I lean toward this, too. In #143 you sum up a perfectly reasonable explanation for what Ellen might have meant. She was, after all, responding to a criticism. She was upset. I fully understand why her comments caused an uproar, since there is more than one way for those comment to be read and most saw them very negatively. Ellen’s denial that the kids shared anything bad and her asking the comments to be deleted is both appropraite and meaningful to me.
The comments have been reprinted by hater and fansites alike.
Ellen is not responsible for what other people do. She can’t help it if her worst comments are repeated over and over without the accompanying explanation that the kids have never complained.
Ann and Samantha -
Ellen is not responsible for what other people do. She can’t help it if her worst comments are repeated over and over without the accompanying explanation that the kids have never complained.
Kind of reminds me of what Jon told Samantha in his interview with her several months ago about the show always showing conflict between the two of them and never showing resolution. I feel bad that Ellen’s words are out there minus her “resolution” so to speak.
I’m hoping shortly this will blow over for her.
I agree, Ellen is not responsible for what is done w/her words.
I’m the absentee imperfect woman- weeks away from a new addition to our family. ~Samantha
Congrats Samantha. It’s almost time! Can’t wait.
Lily@JW says:
>>I agree, Ellen is not responsible for what is done w/her words.<<
I’m sorry but I’m not comfortable with that unconditional an absolution. Ellen may be young but she’s an adult who has been in the workforce for at least five years now. She’s clearly an bright young woman. Unless she has been hiding under a rock and made no effort to find out anything about Jon’s life before they met, she has to know that there are way too many people, including a nasty flock of tabloid vultures and hate sites, who will take anything than even remotely be construed in a negative way about Kate and distort it even further to being beyond all recognition. Regardless of how she feels about Kate, she clearly does care about the children and it was totally foreseeable that her original comments about what the children might say would become hate site fodder. Anything that hurts their mother has the potential to cause pain and distress to the kids. I hope she uses this as a learning experience and weighs the potential consequences of what she is planning to say before she makes a decision on whether or not to say it more carefully in the future (although I’m not sure that there is anything more that she should be saying unless and until she actual becomes the children’s de facto or de jure stepmother).
Deb,
I agree totally about the paps pictures and that isn’t one of the things I myself ever questioned. I questioned her remarks and her repeated posting and asking for it to be removed.
I try very hard, but do fall short, that in regard to paps pictures to take what is shown with a large grain of salt. Sometimes the shots are clear about the context of the events at the time the shots are taken. Most times not. I try to not address the paps shots too much as they are often used to present a misleading picture just to get attention to the shot, article.
Unfortunately, I can’t over look them as much as I’d like as often there is much talk going on around those shots. But if you will make note I do not have any pictures on my site. I do that because most of the pics are paps pics and although, yes I look at them on other sites, and I admit I may well be splitting hairs regarding myself here, I refuse to promote them on my site.
Unfortunately there is often a paps picture involved when I link to an article and the article may be based around some stupid pic. It can’t be avoided altogether. I have used paps pics on my site once, maybe twice,the second time I was about the botox thing and I think I may have jsut linked, but I can’t remember for sure without looking back, so I’ll say twice. I thought hard about doing that, but to explain what I was talking about in those instances, it was necessary to use the pics.
Many times the person getting the attention from the paps are aware the paps are present and using the cell phone to look at is a common behavior to avoid giving attention to the paps.
I repeat, the paps pictures refered to is not an issue I questioned or ever even addressed, here or elsewhere.
Samantha,
I take it a new baby? Congrats.
I want to address your post specifically, as well as in general others.
I have ALWAYS said, here, on my site and any where else I may have referred to IW that this site is one of integrity & fairness. I said the interview with Ellen was handled well. I never at any time have questioned IW’s intergerity or treatment of anyone. NEVER. Nor have I ever said or even indicated that the fallout which occurred re Ellen’s post interview posts were caused by or encouraged by IW. I never questioned IW’s removing those posts at Ellen’s request. Quite the contrary, I said that IW’s removing them at Ellen’s request was the RIGHT thing to do. That it was the ETHICAL thing to do. I have stated here and on my blog that I have been treated with nothing but respect and kindness from IW. Publicly as well as privately.
Nor have I ever seen anyone else question the integrity of IW. Not in this topic or on my blog or anywhere else I’m familiar with. I can’t address as to everything elsewhere as I’m not familiar with everything else where. I can only address what I’m familiar with.
What I questioned was Ellen’s own words and own actions. Questioning that is NOT the same as questioning IW. IW is NOT responsible for Ellen’s words and actions and I don’t hold IW responsible. IW posted what Ellen wanted and removed what Ellen wanted. IW did what Ellen wanted. As should’ve been done. I repeat – as should’ve been done by IW and as they did.
IW did the right thing in all regards. I have never stated or indicated anything different, EVER nor EVER questioned IW’s intergerity.
PeggyP,
Let me rephrase. I was piggybacking on others’ thoughts. We are all responsible for our own words. However, after Ellen attempted to clarify and wrote that she never said ” that the kids said anything bad” “they never complain about anyone or anything to me.”, she can’t be responsible if those words and her request that they be removed aren’t given the same recognition. I believe she should be given the opportunity to correct the problem, which she did. That’s all she can personally do.
One more thing, I’m not excusing her comment which I think was careless. But, once it’s done – it’s done. Ellen came back immediately to clarify which I appreciated. While her words were already out, there’s only so much one can do to correct a mistake. After that, it’s up to the others to deal with it.
Ziggy,
My comments weren’t directed at you- just the topic at large.
The entire hoopla originated here and I wanted to address it, share my feelings about it and congratulate my dear friend Anya on a job well done. As I said before, the focus of this piece went from a well done interview to hastily made comments after the fact. That’s natural, all things considered, but I wanted to redirect for a moment and hopefully “regroup” a little. I’m not trying to control the conversation, my comment was directed to various outlets. There is such a thing as beating a dead horse, kicking it, and then bashing its brains in. She was our guest and it would be nice if that were a decision she didn’t entirely regret. You know?
Samatha,
I didn’t take it as directed only at me, but I wanted to make my stance clear.
Deb, I also understand that you were addressing the that the pics were questioned by others, not indicating myself alone or that I did. Wanted to make that clear as well.
Ann, you are correct in that Ellen did include further remarks stating that she didn’t mean anything negative. And you are correct in that those remarks aren’t re-posted. I understand your remark wasn’t directed at me or singly me out, but you made a valid point. I didn’t repost that, but I will make that correction.
As for anything futher I have to say regarding this, as I respect IW and don’t want IW to be held accountable in any way for my words, what I to say futher about this I will post on my blog about it
as I do have more to say. I do not think Ellen is the all innocent, naive young woman.
Although IW may have been the one to request the interview (I don’t know one way or the other)
Ellen agreed to it. IW treated Ellen with respect and kindness and fairness. It is Ellen herself who went beyond the interview, of her OWN free will. IW is ONLY responsible for the initial AGREED upon interview. Anything Ellen choose of her own free will to say beyond that is completely and fully Ellen’s own responsibility and IW is NOT responsible for the fallout from either the interview or the post interview wors of Ellen’s. Ellen agreed to an interview in which she was aware comments about said interview were allowed. She didn’t agree to an interview where there was interview only, no comments allowed. Ellen is young but she is not a child.
Samantha@IW says:
There is such a thing as beating a dead horse, kicking it, and then bashing its brains in. She was our guest and it would be nice if that were a decision she didn’t entirely regret. You know?
Thank you Thank you Thank you Thank You Thank You Thank You.
The End
One more thing I’d like to add – I did comment about the pic of Ellen and Jon dropping the kids off at Kates as I felt that was a photo op, not a paps pic.
Ellen should have remembered that she was a guest on a pro Kate site, and conducted herself accordingly. Unfortunately, it’s events like these that often define who we really are. I’m saddened that once again, Jon and his girlfriend (s) get a free pass for unacceptable comments and behaviors, especially, since every word and move that Kate makes, gets dissected over and over again on the hate sites. Now, these despicable hate sites have more hate-filled ammo to hurl at Kate 24/7! I for one, wont give her a free pass to bad mouth Kate–I hope Kate does what I’m doing–I’m just going to consider the source….
Why is Ellen saying anything? She has” known” Jon, in the biblical sense, 3 months. What’s up with that?
Vanessa, not much is up with Jon =)) Ellen is a fame-monger–see, I didn’t use the other word! =)