This article was originally posted in February 2009 at GDNNOP. We thought it very timely. Last weekend brought us Baby Doll Dress Gate. Kate was condemned by certain bloggers for not wearing proper attire to “play with the kids” and for sitting down on the stairs to drink lemonade. It got us thinking — haven’t we had this discussion before?
By Ann
Comments and criticism about Kate had me thinking: did my mom play with me when I was a child? I consider my parents to be among two of the best. I can only look back on my childhood with respect and gratitude for my mother and father. I do not recall my mother ever “playing” with me when we were children. Nor do I remember my friends or neighbors’ moms playing with us. When I was growing up, playing was the business of children, not adults.In fact, my dad was unusual because he would organize whiffle ball games or do silly things like Jon does with the Play Dough. My mom did not even supervise from a lawn chair. In fact, she was known on a rare occasion to deal with sibling rivalry and whining by sending us outside on a summer day, saying, “Get along,” and locking the door! Maybe she didn’t bother because we had a lot of siblings, though my friends from smaller families didn’t have moms who played either.
I supervised my children (more than my parents supervised me) because of our hilly yard and the type of street we live on. Sometimes I’d garden, sometimes I’d push swings, but often I’d sit in a lawn chair and read or knit. I don’t remember my kids complaining that I didn’t “play enough” with them. I tried once to play Barbies with my oldest daughter. My Barbie was ‘too authoritative’ for hers, so she gently took it away. Instead, we bonded over books, cooking, gardening, shopping (for her, not me,) and doing her hair. She played dolls, Legos, “house,” and “fort” with her friends, neighbors, and siblings, just as I did.
Do you play with your children? Do you supervise from a favorite perch? Did your mom play with you when you were growing up? Do you think Kate needs to play with the kids more, or do you think the activities they do are a good fit for their family?
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42 Responses to GDNNOP Flashback: Does Kate Play Enough? Do You?
You know…what is it anyones business how much Kate does or doesn’t play with her kids? I am a parent of two (18 and 13) and yes, I did play with them when they were younger, but I don’t remember my mom or dad coming outside when I was younger and playing with me. Does that mean I had bad parents? No. My parents both worked. When I was very small, I had a stay at home mom. When I started school, my mom went to work, but when I came home from school I ALWAYS had a parent at home when I got there. My dad would have a hot meal on the table if my mom was at work and on Fridays we always went out to eat. Why is everyone worried about what Kate is doing or not doing? What about Jon? Why don’t we ever hear about how dads are not spending enough time with their kids? My kids are bigger now and like spending time with their friends, but I still have movie night with my son and still go shopping with my daughter and spend one on one time with them. Kates job is being in the media and she is providing for her kids. They have clothes on their backs, food on their table, a very nice house, so what is the problem? Yes, she is not a movie star that is away making movies or a singer making music, but she is a mom who since these kids were babies has had the job of being on television. Not until her and Jons problems became public did I ever hear people talk bad about her. I think people should worry about their own kids and leave her alone. Until I see with my own eyes or her kids come forward and say that Kate is a bad mom, then all I see is a woman who is standing on her own and trying to make sure that her kids can keep the life they have had and are use to.
Hello Sherry and welcome to Imperfect Women.
I think you can tell that most of us here at IW are not worried about what Kate is doing or not doing. We are more concerned that she has the right to raise her children and live her life the way she chooses to.
The Gosselin children have 7 siblings to play with. How great is that? I had 4 and we could entertain ourselves for hours. I can only imagine how much fun it would be to have 7.
I don’t think it is necessary for a parent to play with their children to be considered a “good” parent. There are lots of other ways to show children love and guidance.
I think people should worry about their own kids and leave her alone.- Sherry
Amen, I agree.
Yes, I always “played” with my children. What an odd question!
My youngest is now 18, so I’m starting to miss those days. Be it board-games, swimming, especially swimming and pool games, the trampoline, riding bikes, playing Legos or Barbies…my children adored having me play with them. As did their friends. It felt like camp around my house when the children were younger, we always had a ton of kids around.
The way you phrased this article makes me feel like it’s somehow strange or unusual, but playing with your kids, daily, gives you so many precious memories as they get older.
It’s not always fun, it’s not always easy, but it is (IMO) a critical part of your relationship with your child.
Both Jon and Kate commented on the show how the kids created many of their own ongoing games with each other. I think there’s a middle way that has room for parents sharing experiences with their kids but gives the kids time when they can play on their own without a helicopter parent, too. IIRR, when they were still together, Jon & Kate had a regular movie night with the kids. However, kids the age that the Gosselins are now, especially when there are enough of them to qualify as their own play group, playing outdoors tend to want to play with each other, not adults. She’s keeping an eye on them to make sure things don’t get out of hand. Kate’s never seemed all that sporty, except for running, anyhow.
Lots of mothers & other women wear sundresses and sandals and what woman with long hair hasn’t just pulled it back to get it out of the way when they’re relaxing, particularly in their own home. The nasty commenters have made it clear that no matter what Kate does, she can’t win with them.
I played w/mine. We played kickball, wrestled, I jumped in the pool with them. There were other times I sat there and read. They didn’t hang around to watch me work, so they were off playing by themselves or with friends a good part of the time. Plenty of times they did not want me around. After a certain age, they will begin to view you as the family pet; you’re wonderful to have around when they want you.
One thing that pops in my mind, is when we would go to the pool as children. Almost no mother went swimming more than to wet themselves and get back out. Heaven forbid, their hair got wet. They would have to reset it themselves or get in another visit at the salon. We never thought about it. Moms ruled and that’s the way it was.
I play more with this last one, because she only has me at home, no little sibs. The days of letting your child roam freely to play w/their friends are over. So, it’s a different world than what I and the first two grew up in. She’s finally getting to the stage where she enjoys playing alone (thank goodness). It took her awhile to get there. I got her a puppy last year because she really needed an extra playmate at home. We love him to death and he took the pressure off of “I want someone to play with”.
I tried once to play Barbies with my oldest daughter. My Barbie was ‘too authoritative’ for hers, so she gently took it away.
I thought I copied that in my post. That made me laugh. Mine is just the opposite and very bossy of my Barbie.
It’s funny you mention your dad organizing the whiffle ball games. I do recall that if there was an adult playing outdoors, it was a dad. While my mom never played outdoors, she did sometimes play board games w/us. It was still mostly my dad. My mom’s work was never done and I can identify.
Princess.Mom says: It’s not always fun, it’s not always easy, but it is (IMO) a critical part of your relationship with your child.
I hear you. Your house sounds fun and I can see why it would be the place to hang out for your kids and their friends.
The only caveat I would add is there are homes where mom and dad playing with the kids is less frequent or maybe only happens occasionally. I do think the number of siblings close in age is a factor — more playmates for the kids, but more work (and less time for playing) for the parents.
I don’t know that I agree that regularly playing with one’s child is ”critical” in every family.
PeggyPA says: I think there’s a middle way that has room for parents sharing experiences with their kids but gives the kids time when they can play on their own without a helicopter parent, too.
I meant to respond to this too. I totally agree. I am glad you brought up the helicopter parent. My sense is some of the judgment about what other parents are doing comes from this frame of reference — which I don’t find to be the healthiest model out there.
Middle way. I like!
i played with my *only child* but not like a friend or other sibling would play…and certainly not as often. i read to him, played board games with him, took him to the park, library, and pushed him in the swigs and watched movies with him. but other than that i watched him and made sure he was ok and left him to play on his own.
his dad would toss the football or baseball around with him at times. we helped him fly kites.
he’s 23 and i do remember reading when i was raising him that kids should learn how to play alone and be ok with that.
my own mom never played with us…never read to us. we watched tv together and she took us on walks and to the park. i don’t remember her pushing us in the swings but she may have. most of the families we knew were that way.
i don’t think it’s anyone bt kate’s business if/when she plays with her kids. she did/does more than i did with mine i bet.
Anya-Thanks. Allowing for considerable hyperbole, the comments by some of those who claim to be mothers on ROL and other places scare me. I know my late mother loved me & we spoke every day on the phone once I grew up & moved away. We did a lot of things with Mom and/or Dad as a family and one on one, but she also gave me and my siblings space to learn and explore and think on our own when we were growing up. We knew how high a priority we had with her, but we also knew that she had an identity as a human being, not just as our mother, and that we had identities as human beings, not just as her kids. I always felt mothered, not smothered.
Thought provoking questions in this article. How much playtime interaction is enough? For some children 24/7 is not enough, for others perhaps just a few minutes each day is enough. IMO one must be aware of the child and the childs world and interact accordingly. The very fact that Kate “watches” lends itself to excellence in parenting. For many children just being able to turn around during play and actually see mom is reassurance.
My parents always from infancy interacted with my brother & I in games and conversations that contained substance and taught life skills and knowledge. Once after a rain shower we were all cleaning up after dinner and my mom suddenly told eveyone that cleanup could wait & everyone should quickly get into rain gear. She told my dad there was a rainbow and while he was getting his gear to search his memory for everything he could remember about refraction and reflection of the sun’s rays. My brother & I were told not only about refraction & reflection but also about God’s promise, the beauty of nature, and how we could always look for rainbows in life. A walk to the playground park became a lesson in grasses, leaves, flowers, trees, pistons and staymens, aeronautics, wind resistance, etc., etc.
An apple doesn’t fall far from the tree according to an ole saying and even though I am “different” from my parents & brother, this ole adage rings true for me because I am a product of my environment and am not using my parents tricks on my girls. Updated high tech versions of course……..me, nah.
My girls don’t require play interaction from me and actually suggest quite often that I just watch. The four of them prefer each other with the 5′s being the mentors to the 3′s. Rough housing with their dad is a different story and requires my assistance as referee, judge, and nurse. The girls look forward to quite time prior to nap when we discuss how each one feels or we read, “I Just Want You to Know” by Kate Gosselin. They love that book and their new game is writing letters.
Kate, like me seems to enjoy cooking and meal preparation. If her house is anything like mine, meal times are teaching, learning, individual time, and family togetherness.
Do you play with your kids enough? How much is enough? This is a question that shoudl be thrown into the cosmic universe because there is probably not a definitive answer. All you can do if reflect at the end of the day and ask yourself did I do good things today and if not then strive to make all the tomorrows better. As my 5′s asked me the other day, “Mommy, will tomorrow be gooder than today?”. My answer, “Of course it will if we decide to make it so.”
Writing this sorta, kinda, choked me up…… Thank you Mom & Dad for all your play teachings.
Oops, big bad typo….I meant to say I am a product of my environment and am NOW using my parents tricks on my girls. Please re-read and let your brain re-direct my thoughts about this.
I grew up in the 60′s and 70′s. Kids roamed the neighborhoods and mothers were never outside playing (or even watching their kids). We played with each other and occasssionally one Mom or another would would bring out Kool-Aid and cookies. Even as pre-schoolers my Mom would send my brother, sisters, and I downstairs to play by ourselves. Dad would throw the ball around with us or whatever but that was an occassional weekend activity.
Parents can bond with kids over many things that don’t involve play. We bonded over dinner when we each had to report on our day. We bonded on the family trips we took each summer to historical sites and the hour long car rides to my grandparents where we would talk to each other. We bonded over learning skills (cooking, baking, knitting, etc), discussing the evening news, creating traditions around holidays, etc.
I realized that in many ways, it was a very old fashioned childhood. Mothers on the praire (Little House/Laura Ingalls Wilder) and mothers during the depression (The Waltons) didn’t play with their children and yet they were very close. The time spent together was in teaching the children skills and values.
We are a product of our times and I, like most of my contemporaries, played more with my son than my parents did with us. But play is not what has kept my son and I close (he is 16). I would say we have bonded over shared interests – music, theater, science much more than we ever bonded over playing with his toys.
I see Kate bonding with kids in different ways. She loves running and we know she has shared that with Cara (recent 5K run). We saw the older girls helping in the kitchen which is certainly a bonding time. She has blogged about judging a dress up contest (judging DWTS style) – play or not, it is all interacting with and spending time with your kids.
Paige,
Beautifully written. I grew up in the same time frame and feel exactly like you do. Yes, I played with my kids more than my parents did with me, but that does not make me a better parent. I continue to strive to be the type of parent my parents are to me and my siblings.
My mom played with me sometimes growing up, but as a whole I understood that it wasn’t her job to “entertain” me. She was always there for me in every way and we are best friends today.
I ”played” with our little girl a lot in her toddler days- as she grew older she was better able to find ways to have fun “alone”. I think that’s important. We still play now, but for the most part she plays and keeps herself busy.
Ditto what Paige and Pam have said. When I was little, the neighborhood kids all got together at one child’s yard, went up to the schoolyard or played kickball in the alley! Moms would check on us and bring out kool-aid and throw-away cups.
My parents were more like teachers in some respect – my Dad was patient with me and taught me about the things (boat motors, doors, plumbing) he was fixing at the time. I would be a little “helper” and handing him whatever tool he needed. Similar things with my mom except it might be sewing or cooking. It wasn’t like “chores.” I enjoyed it!
I play with my child and do activities with him alot, but he is also very good about occupying his own time by playing with toys, watching a Disney movie, looking at books, building with blocks, etc. while I’m showering, cooking, cleaning, etc.
How much you play with your children, in my opinion, doesn’t necessarily equal being a good parent.
Paige and Samantha@JW-
Page-I grew up about a decade earlier than you, but you are describing my childhood perfectly. Mom always said that she hated when daylight savings time ended in the fall because it took away an hour in which she could send us out to play and tire ourselves out while she got dinner ready.
I never, ever truly doubted how important each of us was to my parents, but they always made it clear to us that they weren’t JUST our parents: that jointly and severally they had responsibilities that sometimes required our having to wait or even not get something we wanted and sometimes needed some time on their own, either individually or as a couple. We were never deprived of anything we truly NEEDED, but we learned concepts like deferred gratification, sharing, dealing with not getting one’s own way all of the time, and being able to actively entertain ourselves. In retrospect, I believe that’s the greatest gift they ever gave us. There were no “little Emperors” in our family. My mother’s firm belief was that no child has the right to be a nuisance to themselves or others.
Samantha-You make an important poinit about age appropriateness. I think the best parents make a child feel loved and secure but also realize that they have to prepare the child to be able to be independent. Mommy and Daddy are not going to be around forever & a child who lacks the tools to be independent is going to be a mess as an adult when the parental bubble wrap disappears.
We were never deprived of anything we truly NEEDED, but we learned concepts like deferred gratification, sharing, dealing with not getting one’s own way all of the time, and being able to actively entertain ourselves.
Peggy PA-
Can I just say- Amen.
Ditto what Paige and Pam have said. When I was little, the neighborhood kids all got together at one child’s yard, went up to the schoolyard or played kickball in the alley! Moms would check on us and bring out kool-aid and throw-away cups.-Nancy
Me too Nancy! I agree with Paige and Pam. And, growing up this is exactly what we did. I have 3 siblings. We always made up our own games, and there was always a bunch of neighborhood kids in our basement playing ping-pong, pool, and whatever else, as well as playing kickball, etc. We learned a lot and practiced what our parents taught about manners, sharing, etc.
The lessons we learned are invaluable and helped shaped us as adults.
My parents made certain nights family nights…where we specifically played board games or showed home movies, etc. I do this with my family now. It allows us appreciate our family and get caught up.
Pam you are so right…there are other ways to be a good parent and show love and guidance without playing with kids. I think kids need to learn and grow and the creative process of playing (without parents around) allows that.
Yes, I forgot to mention dinner. We ALWAYS had dinner around the table with our parents. That was a time when there was only conversation – no TV, etc. Also, hot breakfasts on the weekends when Dad could eat with us! Good times!
Yes, Pam, Paige, etc., this is exactly the time frame I grew up in. I had wondeful parents, and I wouldn’t change a thing about my childhood.
The way you phrased this article makes me feel like it’s somehow strange or unusual, but playing with your kids, daily, gives you so many precious memories as they get older.-princess.mom
I don’t think it’s unusual or strange and apologize if it sounds that way. I think it’s great if that is how you like to interact with your kids. There a lots of moms who love dolls and Legos and playing ball. Just not me (I quit trying to do Legos when my 3 year-old was figuring out the directions better than me.)
I have bonded with my children over books, talks, cooking, crafting, science, trips, school work, digging for fossils, etc. I just did’t “play” imaginary games or sports with my kids, and I don’t regret it. I disagree that it is critical that a mother do so. “One size fits all” doesn’t fit everyone.
Ann-I agree. I’m not a mother, but I am a daughter (and always will be, even though my mother died nearly 18 years ago) and an aunt & great-aunt. IMHO, the critical thing is to find a common ground on which parents and children can meet comfortably and without undue pressure, communicate, and find support With my mother and me, it was a shared love of reading, history, and politics and, yes, soap operas (which I eventually gave up after she died; it just wasn’t fun without her to rehash them with). It won’t be one size fits all even with children in the same family.
Every one’s story sounds familiar to me. When I was growing up , life was simpler.We played outside the majority of the day after school. Each family that you associated with had different activities. One might have been a pool table, another a mother that made Italian food you never tasted before, or horseshoes. I don’t remember my mother playing with me. She might have shown me how to play a board game( operation or monopoly) but for the most part it was my siblings that I played with and learned from. My father loved trains and that was a family activity that we all participated in. It started in Sept and ended after the holidays. We would all contribute to the town and scenery. Each year it would be bigger and better. I think mainly my parents would teach us the basic rules of any activity and support us in our interest but they let us develop into letting us become the individuals we became. I will say this dinner was sacred in our house. It was a ritual that we never missed.. You never ever missed Sunday dinner no matter who your best friend was at that time. I might be criticized for this but my parents and grandparents were my teachers to build foundations. They would embrace every success but they would let me know when my behavior was unacceptable. So do I think Kate should play with her kids outside? No I think she should guide them how to play and have fun but let them be children with all the imagination a child should have with the best interest of their safety, what she wears or doesn’t wear is no one business.
I grew up in the 50′s and 60′s in with a stay-at-home mom who was always there, but seldom played with us. There were tons of kids to play with in the neighborhood and at school and we always had something to do… and if we didn’t, we were able to entertain ourselves with no problem. Mom taught us to knit and sew and embroider and cook. She let us experiment in the kitchen when we were old enough to use the stove… She was there as a mom, not a girlfriend. That was the way we wanted it, and I supposed, that was the way she wanted it too. There is no requirement that Kate has to play with her kids. We haven’t seen the kids on camera lately, but when we did, they seemed very happy playing with each other! How lucky to have so many siblings to play with!
I agree with you all and especially Paige. I grew up in the 60s and every house had tons of kids and we ran around from morning till night. I do have fond memories of always cooking with my parents. Being Italian it’s a big deal and you start in the highchair stirring etc. They also taught us how to gamble. LOL. Rainy days were spent learning the finer points of poker and black jack or how to pick the horses.
Parents should interact with their kids where they too can have fun. Children can sense when parents are truly enjoying themselves. I think now days too many parents try to control children’s play. Play is an important part of childhood and they need to learn to play with their peers on their own level.
I have no opinion on the Gosselins concerning play.
The issue of Kate playing with the kids, as with so many issues surrounding the Gosselins, simply reminds me that different doesn’t always equal “better” or “worse.” Some mothers (and fathers) play with their kids; some don’t. I do think the Gosselin kids are unusually set in the playmate department, since they have plenty of age-appropriate peers surrounding them at all times.
So funny you did this storey, my mom & I were having a conversation the other day about playing with your kids. She actually said the word’s “I really did not play with you kid’s, maybe I was a bad mom”. I reminded her of all the bike rides & trips to the beach& park, cooking , stories etc..I even remembered her playing Barbies with me once on Christmas Night. Although, I’m a member of the” play anywhere in the neighbourhood but be home when the street lights come on generation.” I still believe my mom played with us, just in a different way & she also taught us independence. I think it’s situational, every child has a different need at different stages I play, sometimes but not alway’s. We sing & read everyday, but do I sit down and play barbies or play soccer everyday no. My 3 yo probably put it best the other day…We had been playing Princess, I was finished with the game so I said “This Princess need’s to vacuum , the palace”. She gave me a serious look & said “No, princesses don’t vacuum…mommy’s do!” Now, if I had a palace maid maybe I’d have the time & energy to play all day with the kid’s, but for now I’m just trying to do the best I can. I think it’s most important to do what’s best for you & your family & not worry about what the “experts” tell us.
I am the mother of two boys and yes, I did play with them, but their father also played w/them after work. Our daily routine was after dinner we would go out and play with the boys when they were younger. Did I get in the rough and tumble, no, but I could hold my own in a baseball, football or basketball game. When my children were the tups age I was outside w/them, was I playing every minute w/them, no, but being criticized for sitting and drinking lemonade? What! I sat many a time on my back stoop, or in the yard watching them play. I am of the baby boomer generation and both my parents never played with me. My Dad was a hard working jack-of-all trades who worked for himself and my Mom stayed home. In the summertime we were sent outside to play, came back for lunch, then sent out again, and then it was dinnertime and you came in. Then my Dad who was an older father wanted to be w/his girls so we weren’t delegated outside again. God forbid if during the day you came back in the house, where you would get a “What are you doing here?” Go back outside. He! He! No parent is perfect. I just want to wish the 6 Gosselins a Happy 6th Birthday. Hopefully it will be a better b’day for them than last year.
Hello to all of you Imperfect Women,
Just stopping in to wish everyone a very happy Mother’s Day.
From reading your comments and posts I think that everyone of us must be the most excellent of Mothers. May God bless you and keep you mothering for many days to come.
PS: I love IW!
My I’m full of thought’s today(I’m having company later,& I seem to enjoy the rush of last minute fast tidy)
I think a good topic of discussion would be are kid’s playing enough in general? We used to live accross from a beautiful park, in a small town. It was very rarely used, my older daughter would play there with her friends. We’d take the little girls, & it was like our own private park. I wonder if it’s because we are so busy with organized activities with our kid’s, we’ve forgotten the art of free play. Also, because it’s a different time even in small town’s it’s not considered safe to let your kid’s roam. Maybe kid’s just have more to do at home? The park was a joyous place for me as a child, my own children love it. I’ve often wondered if it was just that town or if parks in general are not used as much. What do you ladies think?
P.S. I just this week talked Mr.M into a trampoline for the kid’s(he thinks they are tacky & an eyesore) It is but the kid’s love it, I’m going to work on him for one of those cool balls the G kid’s were playing with next.:) I just have to keep mentioning how much they’ll miss the park & our pool this summer. Although, our new town has a lovely park by the lake so it might not fly.
Love this topic! My kids are 7 and 8 and we live on a dead-end street with 10 houses on each side. Pretty much all the kids run around when they are home. If no neighbors are available to play with, I’m more in demand. But I stopped “sitting in my chair in the driveway
about two years ago when death was no longer on my mind every 3 minutes. I love being the mom who comes out with drinks and snacks so kids feel comfortable around our house, as the kids get older. I’d rather have them around here than someone else’s.
Sometimes I do wish I would play more (we played HORSE last week). My husband is more the play thing for them when he gets home from work.
I think we should do a topic of great outside toys and playthings for the upcoming LONGGGGG summer!
Momsby-I’m glad I’m not a kid now and not for the usual old fogey reasons (it was a 3/4 mile walk from our house to the road where our school bus picked us up & it was pretty flat, not uphill both ways<g> We did get a lot of snow but they get a lot of snow there now, too.). Kids’ time seems so relentlessly scheduled now. We certainly had classes, both dance and piano, chores, homework, and after school activities but we had oceans of time to explore our property (we lived in the country), play with our cats and dogs, read, and just be kids. I’d put on plays for my parents with my younger brother dragooned to be in the cast or use a little theater set with Disney figurines that someone gave us to put them on for myself. I usually performed wearing what my mother called my “draggy skirt”-a long (for me) skirt with an elastic wasteband. I was a horse for a rather prolonged period when I was three. I see my parents as giving each of us the gift of time to figure out who we were and what we wanted to be. Even the lessons were designed to that end. They asked us to make a good faith effort at it, but accepted with very little fuss that, depending on the activity, our interest in it and our talent for doing it varied. They guided and led us with the goal of our becoming independent, happy, responsible adults. They weren’t perfect and they made mistakes, but so did each of us kids. I wouldn’t have traded them for anyone else. They loved us to death & we knew it.
Thanks for the great responses, ladies. And thanks for the discussion topics too. CincyMom: Great Outside toys, playthings for summer. Momsby: Do kids play enough in general anymore?
Momsby, I agree with your husband that trampolines are ugly in the yard, but we LOVE ours. They are worth the money for us. My kids are teens and they and their friends still jump on it. One of my children uses it to improve her sports skills. We have had ours for 6 years this summer, and we are waiting for our third net to arrive. High winds did it in last fall. Personally, I tire out after one minute this time of year, but I’ll get much better by fall!
I play with my younger son more, because of his developmental delays, he doesn’t have many “peers”. I have to admit that if I had six children, all the same age, I’d make them go outside and play with each other.
. I can’t imagine having my parenting skills or lack there of , constantly critiqued. I know people say she chose to put herself on display. But it gets downright nutty when she can’t do anything right. I’d be curious to take a look at the lives of the “good moms” that spend hours going from site to site, spewing hate. I can just imagine some poor toddler with a saggy pull-up and a sippy cup full of Kool-aid tugging on her mom, and being shooed away so mommy can finishing telling Kate what she is doing wrong.
No, my mom didn’t really play with me. She set things up (such as the pool) watched us and made sure we were safe & had what we needed. It never occured to me that she should play with us. And I think we really didn’t want her to, as we could do things she wouldn’t want us to do as long as she was watching from afar. I played with my kids some, but not a great deal. I spent more time talking to them, teaching them things. I do recall, after showing my youngest the wonders of a dining room table tent, having to crawl in there with her for just some mommy alone time.
I don’t think parents should play with their kids all the time. A neighbor played with her kids all the time and they couldn’t entertain themselves if she wasn’t able to come play with them. I thought that was sad.
Wishing all the Imperfect Women a perfect day!
Back at ya’ momsby!!
Happy Mother’s Day Momsby and Ziggy. We did have a Mother’s Day thread in the lounge and you can find it here.
Just a reminder that we have a lot of other great topics on our site besides Gosselin Chatter and would love to have you come and share in the discussions on the other threads.
Momsby says: Wishing all the Imperfect Women a perfect day!
Wonderfully said!
So nice to see the thoughtful participation on this thread.
It and YOU are appreciated.
I played with my kids when *they* invited me to. Long before the age of 6, my kids had great imaginations and I would just get in the way of their great adventures. I’m sure if I had someone taking pictures of me all the time, they would have deemed that I either played with my kids too much or not enough. Who cares?! My kids were happy, and from the looks of it, her kids seem happy, too.