By Anya
With the return of “Kate Plus 8″ to TLC this June, viewers will once again get to witness Kate’s parenting of the Gosselin children up-close.
We thought it might be a good time to revisit a popular topic from GDNNOP (our former home) days. In what areas do you think Kate excels as a parent?
The ground rules: while we are interested in a wide spectrum of opinions, this particular thread is devoted to sharing your positive impressions. There are plenty of other forums to discuss your opinions if you can’t be kind. Feel free to chime in on Jon too. Also, we would be amiss if we did not acknowledge that we only know Jon and Kate’s parenting from what we have seen on an edited TV show. Here are some comments that were made on GDNNOP back in the day to get the creative juices flowing!
-I appreciate the way Kate tries to always celebrate the holidays with a little extra fun. My mom did that and I did that for my kids too.
-I do like how Kate has them eat meals together. I like how the kids seem to be good eaters and I do attribute that to Kate.
-She doesn’t do ‘baby talk’ with her kids, she speaks to them with normal language and tone. I appreciate that she offers fairly ‘grown up’ explanations to Mady and Cara. She really seems to want them to understand the ‘why’ of life.
-One thing I appreciate about Kate’s parenting is that she’s consistent. Her children go to time out without being told twice and they stay there until told they can get up. That only comes with consistency.
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Comments
16 Responses to GDNNOP Flashback: Kate’s Parenting – What Do You Like?
The thing that stands out to me about Kate’s parenting is when her life as she knew it was crumbling around her she didn’t fold like I would have. She picked up what she could and showed her children strength and courage at such a dark time in their lives.
I also liked how she’d put together fun projects for the kids to do and how the kids were expected to do chores that are age-appropriate, even using the inate competitiveness of siblings to make the chores exciting and fun.
I agree with what you say about time outs. They also seem very well-behaved in public (without looking like the pre-Maria von Trap kids in the Sound of Music.<g>)
There are many qualities that I admire Kate parenting skills. I have read many rude and crude comments that have been made about her need to being in control/or perfect which she herself has admitted needed a overhaul. But when I watched the show I see a mother that has great organization skills that creates balance and stability in a busy household. Here are a few of my observations and how I see the lessons the children are learning daily.
1. Most meals are served at the table which I see as a good way to learn table manners and how to share a meal with others. It also allows the children to concentrate on the meal they are being served, without the distractions of the TV being on. It also encourages conversations and sharing of each child’s day. The other benefit of sitting at the table is that you see how much your child eats which is indicator on how they are feeling. If a child does not eat their normal portion it could mean they might being getting a bug or that snack time needs to be adjusted.
2. I love that they still have movie night every week. I think it is so important to set aside one activity that all the children can enjoy together. Now that they are getting older I can see the life skills they are receiving. They are learning that they have choices and opinions. They are learning how to negotiate when there is a choice of more then one movie. They are learning about group decisions and how the outcome benefits everyone. It also creates a dialogue afterwards for discussions that can be shared at meal time.
3. I love that Kate strives to be consistent with her daily routines so that the children have stability and routine to their days. These foundations will help as the children get older with the bigger challenges they will face with school and extra curricular activities.
I love the points made so far, and agree with them all.
I copied a couple of my GDNNOP thoughts:
*Kate grasps that the sextuplets miss out on things that an individual child routinely gets (undivided attention, for example) and strives to give them individual attention and special things.
*At her best, she uses positive reinforcement effectively. (“Who sits nicely gets to be dressed first.”)
I’ll add a couple of more recent observations:
*Kate demonstrates to her children the importance and reward of living a healthy lifestyle. From all accounts, she eats a healthy diet and provides one for her children. She recognizes, however, that we all need a treat from time to time and she is flexible about that. She also works out regularly and demonstrates that taking care of oneself is important.
*She works on facing her fears rather than letting them overpower her. I really admire that.
Anya, totally agree with all you wrote. I admire these about Kate, too. And, I really like that she makes well-balanced homemade meals for the kids.
Oh, It was late last night when I read and posted, I misunderstood. I wouldn’t be hurt if you deleted my first post.
I liked the way Kate & Jon had the kids take a time out after one hurting another and having them look the hurt one in the eye’s and say they were sorry
I also like that she makes the effort to treat her kids as individuals, with their own personalities, strengths, weaknesses and quirks – perhaps not easy, when you have that many! I like that she focuses on “making memories” – she seems really conscious of wanting her kids to be able to look back and remember things from their childhood fondly.
I agree with all of the above:
1) I admire the way Kate is working hard to keep the kids in an excellent private school that can protect them from public scrutiny which might be difficult at a public school.
2) I think it is great that Kate recognizes that the twins need time and space for themselves and have tried to give them a seperate area in each house.
3) I am impressed that Kate really supports the kids going to college, tried to convince Jon that the will should be written in a way that encourages college attendance, and talks about the children’s potential careers in terms of those that need higher education.
She works on facing her fears rather than letting them overpower her. I really admire that.~Anya
Ita. I remember the episode in HI when she was so afraid to get in the open water on a raft. She was really scared and so was Mady. Kate went in so Mady would would try it. I thought it was great how she wanted Mady to have the experience and didn’t want her to miss out.
Paige, I agree about their private school. She’s made their education a priority and their school as constant in their lives. Their school life has remained private except for the pap pics at the bus stop.
They did some great things for the kids on J&K+8. There are a benefits to filming. Her children seem polite and secure. It was also the HI trip when all the kids shook hands with the chef (one of the cooks?) one by one and said “nice to meet you”. That was adorable. Of course, we have no idea of their day-to-day lives and haven’t seen them on tv in months, but I’m sure that is something that has stayed with them. They have some good times on their trips with wonderful experiences that were just for them.
Kate strives hard to give them nutritious meals and feeds her family well.
i have to agree with all of the above. she has so many good qualities and i feel she is teaching strength of character by example.
that said, i enjoy the times when we’ve seen kate just let go and have fun with the kids. the duck duck goose game, the dress up…it was a joy to see her laughing and rolling on the floor and beds with them.
Lily says….I remember the episode in HI when she was so afraid to get in the open water on a raft. She was really scared and so was Mady. Kate went in so Mady would would try it. I thought it was great how she wanted Mady to have the experience and didn’t want her to miss out.
Lily, funny. That was one of the episodes I was reflecting on when I wrote that.
Kimmie says. i enjoy the times when we’ve seen kate just let go and have fun with the kids
I agree, Kimmie. It is nice to see Kate allow herself that.
Does anyone watch “Modern Family?” A recent episode featured “the mom” on vacation in Hawaii except she couldn’t really relax because she was so concerned about keeping track of her three kids. I thought it was a good insight into how moms (especially with multiple children) feel overwhemed and not able to “let go”. Taking time for oneself or just horse around is seen is as an extravagence.
I understand that, but in everything there is a balance and I think it is good for moms to allow themselves those free moments.
Being the mother of multiples lends itself to exhaustion and when exhaustion wins you have to take a time-out and re-energize. Sometime you have to go to extreme measures to be gentle with your own self. I feel that Kate has found many methods that work for her. Spa, anyone?
Change is a tough cookie. Going from a free existance to the total beck and call of a squirming, crying, pooping little human who doesn’t weigh as much as your waffle maker is daunting. Imagine how tough it is to have 2 at once then 6 at once. I imagine the noise level alone would be enough to put anyone on edge. Kate held on to her faith and let her belief system be her guide and found reassurance, rest, and comfort for her soul in that system. I’m sure it helped her as it has helped me but the noise level is still quite high. The Bible reminds us that there is a time and a season for everything. Kate has taken time to focus on her children and has seen the importance of investing in them when they have the greatest need for her while still being aware that other seasons will follow.
In motherhood there are many sweet, tender, and blissful moments that bridge the gap between our expectations and the reality of being on duty 24/7, and there are many shocking, unexpected happenings that make a mom wonder how to make it through the next 30 minutes….not to mention the next 10 or 20 years. Kate has all these moments each day multiplied by 6!!!!!! How does she do it? I think she has recognized needs and met them which has allowed her the freedom to enjoy the reality of where she is.
Mothering truly does matter. No one can replace what a mother offers in the life of a child. Kate has taken what she has to offer and matched it to the needs of each of her children. Isn’t it a wonderful thing to watch a mother recognize the needs of so many different children? Our children inspire us to stretch our world while we teach them to stretch theirs.
IMHO Kate is a truly admirable mother and a fabulous teacher to her children. She is most certainly an inspiration to me.
I once dated a guy who had an identical twin (my guy was quite a bit thinner than his twin; otherwise they were totally identical. They even sounded alike). A few years later, their parents has a baby girl. His mom told me that, compared to looking after twins, looking after a single baby was like a vacation.
Well, I had to look back at what I wrote when we first posted this back on the other blog. Interesting, don’t you think?
She is organized – maybe a tad over-organized. But I wish my laundry room and kitchen were as neat as hers.
She posts the kids artwork in kitchen – fridge, back door, cabinets, etc.
She cuddles with the kids. It is evident all of the children love and care for her.
She rarely ever curses. I don’t think I’ve ever seen/heard it, but I could be wrong. And, it is TV, so I’m sure she has, haven’t we all?
Regardless of all the bickering – she does love Jon.
I like that she has made a commitment for the kids to eat healthy and organic food.
I like how organized she is.
I like how set a consistent for her kids.
Sue
Yes, I did control myself from adding a BUT but I’ve haven’t been around in a while and thought I would start off being good!
Sue says: Yes, I did control myself from adding a BUT but I’ve haven’t been around in a while and thought I would start off being good!
LOL! Thanks, Sue.