By Lily
In 1992, a mother was told she could not nurse her baby at a mall in Florida. She happened to be a writer and wrote an article which caught the attention of a state representative. He proposed a new law which stripped breastfeeding of being considered indecent. The bill passed in 1993 and many states followed the example. Currently, 44 states and the District of Columbia have laws which allow a mother to breastfeed in any public or private location.
In spite of these laws, nursing women often make the headlines after being asked “not to do that here.” Indignant and angry mothers who want to feed their children are a mighty force. Protests are organized and the accused usually issues a public apology while making it known that their business welcomes women who breastfeed.
How do you feel about it? Where you ever told you were not allowed? Do you feel that a mother has a right to breastfeed where ever she wants or should she be in a private setting? Does it bother you if your children or significant other witness a woman while she is nursing? What are your thoughts on this topic?
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18 Responses to Is Breasfeeding in Public Still an Issue?!
I was never comfortable breastfeeding my daughter in public but I did find places in semi- private places to feed her like the car etc. I don’t think it’s my place as a person to tell a mother where to feed her baby. Babies need to eat too!!!
I’ve nursed all four of my kids until they were one year or older. So I’ve breastfed in public many times. I’ve never had a problem with anyone giving me a hard time about it. It does not bother me in the least if my kids or my husband see other women breastfeeding in public. For our family, that is just how babies eat. Personally, I like to be discreet about it but I’ve seen some women with full breasts and nipples exposed. And I understand that some babies nurse better with nothing in their way. LOL! But I can see how something like that would bother people particularly men who see breasts as primarily sexual organs. (Is “organ” the right word? Sounds funny but you know what I mean. )
Teresa E. – I think those men need to be educated and enlightened! LOL.
I think the percentage of babies that really nurse better with mom letting it “all hang out” would be kind of small – ? I am not sure. I haven’t dealt with this in many years! I think some women just prefer to do it that way and that is their right even if it wouldn’t be my choice.
I think it is pretty much a non-issue because most women prefer a more modest approach anyway. Either way you go, a bystander can always just look in the other direction. That’s what I do when I see couples sucking face. I don’t really need to see that either!
I breastfed all three of my kids in public, but I tried to be as modest as possible(NOT always easy to do, with the size of my organs).
I personally did have a few “looks” suprisingly enough by some older women, but nothing major.
I did have a BF situation years ago, as a waitress. I had a man call me over & angrily ask me to please to something about that disgusting woman across the restaurant.
I looked around, could not see what the problem was, he pointed and literally shouted “THAT WOMAN IS BREASTFEEDING!!!”
I offered to move him, but refused to stop the woman from nursing & I “may” have said something to the effect, that if she was cutting her toenails at the table that would be disgusting…nursing a baby is her legal right.
He asked for a manager,(who was known as the Dragon Lady) and much to my relief she backed me up. The boobies could stay free, the baby could be fed(although, she really was being discrete)
I also gave the mom a free dessert & over the top service while he was stuck with The Dragon Lady ( who was a terrible server & glares from all the other servers). That’s my funniest boobie story, I’ve laughed about it often over the years.
There’s a solution to the problem of being offended by seeing women breastfeeding in public. It’s called not looking. It’s not that difficult.
I don’t think I’ve ever seen a woman breastfeeding in public who wasn’t being discreet; I probably would be surprised to see one “letting it all hang out.” But I wouldn’t be offended (though it’s interesting to hear that some mothers might do it because their babies nurse better that way - I didn’t realize that).
The primary function of breasts is for feeding babies. Culturally, we may see them as sexual body parts but that’s not really what they are there for. Nobody is going to be scarred for life by the sight of a naked breast or a baby feeding on one.
I also breastfed mine for over a year and I had to breastfeed in public occasionally. I never had any trouble being discreet. I have never been asked to stop. I have also never seen a woman and baby cause a “scene” breastfeeding.
Momsby, great story. I have a problem with people who go out of their way to be offended by breastfeeding as that customer clearly did. It sounds like you handled the situation well.
My sister-in-law is one of those “let it all hang out” breastfeeders and she doesn’t care at all which is fine. She and other “let it all hang out” moms have told me their babies don’t like clothing hanging in their face or they (the babies) don’t like being covered up. Fortunately for me, none of my kids minded.
Did anyone see that show “What Would You Do?” They did an episode about breastfeeding in public. It was sort of surprising to see people, especially a man, argue so strongly in support of a woman’s right to breastfeed in public. It was great to see although who knows which ones they choose to put on the show. They also changed the appearance of a woman- teenage girl, African American but I don’t remember the results. Anyway, I thought that was interesting segment.
And I absolutely agree. If you don’t like it, then don’t look. So easy. Sheesh.
I nursed my little one in public – for me I liked being discreet. I had a little poncho-thingy so he could eat and I didn’t need to worry about someone staring at the “girls.”
I also found several very “nursing friendly” places and tried to go there to meet friends for lunch or coffee. Nothing makes a nursing mom more comfy than being around other nursing moms – at least it was that way for me.
Don’t like it? Don’t look. Great advice!
I breastfed all three of my children, the youngest is 26 and oldest is 31. It was not “in vogue” but I fed them all in public, discreetly and never had a problem with anyone complaining. I have a bigger issue with woman running all over with their breasts hanging out of sundresses, tank tops and bathsuits than a woman using their breasts for what they are designed to do. Yet that “over exposure” is perfectly acceptable in today’s society. Go figure.
I breastfed both of my children until they were a year old. They are now in their twenties. I had no issues back in the 80s with breastfeeding. I remember nursing several times with both kids on airlines.
For some reason, men seem to be the most squeamish about seeing a woman breastfeed. Go figure.
I breast fed my two children until they were about two and a half. This is longer than normal but they both have multiple food intolerances. They wanted to keep feeding and I was happier being fairly sure that they weren’t being introduced directly to foods that they could develop intolerances to. Plus, before you do it, no-one tells you what a beautiful and reciprocal arrangement it is! I loved feeding them.
Sometimes I had to feed in public and occasionally it wasn’t as discreet as I would have liked. My daughter particularly would want to be fed for hours at a time. So I do have some residual feelings of shame about offending people by feeding in public; but sometimes it was the best way of keeping my daughter quiet, she was a very active baby. That I still feel slightly ashamed of having fed overtly is wrong really, most times it was out of necessity. I think we should be more tolerant and supportive of breastfeeding.
The La Leche League works hard to encourage feeding mothers, their valuable work needs support.
I had an uncle, now deceased (so this was long ago) who breast fed until he was 5! He remembered getting his mom(an immigrant) a stool and the newspaper so she could feed him, lol.
Mary E, I think it is fantastic that you nursed older children. I hope your feelings of shame are overshadowed by pride knowing that you fed your kids the best way you could given their intolerances.
Ann, have you ever seen Little Britain? They do a regular skit with an adult male who breastfeeds and it is just hilarious. I say to my kids in a British accent, “Would you like some bitty?”
I’ll have to look for it, Theresa E., I’ve never heard of it, but it is sounds great!
Here’s a link:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l8orUaCJ0GY
Gosh, I hope people are not offended by it.
Mary E., I also think it was fantastic that you nursed your children in their best interest. When a child wants to be fed, they need to be fed. We’re built for it. I am a fan of the La Leche League. I was also so grateful for the nurses who did follow-up w/nursing after my last little one was born. She had to be supplemented from the beginning because I didn’t produce enough to feed her, but was trying to give her all I could. The nurse was so encouraging. Nursing in public was not an issue for me as I was at home a lot the 4 mos I was trying and it took her so long. I would have tried to have some modesty, but would have had words if someone had been offended.
Teresa E. That was a hoot. I have never seen that. He kind of reminds me of Michael Myers.
I forgot about LaLeche League. They saved my sanity 31 years ago with my oldest daughter. I chose to breastfeed and my mil was less than supportive. My daughter was 9lbs 14 oz at birth, gained 1 pound, stayed there for 2 months and then gained another pound. My mil would give her formula every chance she got and underminded my efforts. The leader at LaLeche league helped me convince her that all was well and mil became my biggest supporter.
No woman should ever feel ashamed for feeding her babies the way God intended.
I work in the public sector and actually, I find with the styles these days, women who don’t have children: let it “all hang out” – so a beautiful sight like a women breastfeeding her child discreetly would not be offensive to me. As far as exposing anything sexual – what about the thongs I see when I go to the beach that do not leave much to the imagination. The people in the entertainment industry have just about covered it all, or shall I say “uncovered it all” from music videos, movies, concerts, etc. I have seen some pretty shocking sights and a woman breast-feeding is not one of them. I can’t understand why this debated. The previous comment by Rhonda says it all – no woman should ever feel ashamed for feeding her baby the way God intended. It’s the crotch =grabbing on national TV that my breast-fed children watch that disturbs me.