My third child turned 18 today. All grown up. In four more years, I will have completed all of my motherly obligations. I’ve changed at least 5000 diapers, baked 77 birthday cakes (not that I’m counting), and kissed away more tears than I could ever count. I’ve sat in the stands of countless sporting events, plays, and school concerts.
I’ve learned the proper way to tie a necktie and I’ve protected each of them from harm. (Just try to get to them…I dare you.) I’ve helped them write English papers and taught them to do their own laundry. I’ve even taught a few of them to drive –
But today, as my son turns 18, I feel like time is going far too fast. I know it’s so cliche, but when you wake up and your baby is 18, it does make you wonder where the time has gone. I still remember, as though it were yesterday, how tiny he looked in the bassinet. He looked so new.
It seems like just yesterday that he learned to walk and talk. How is it possible that he’s driving a car, growing a beard, and going off to college?
My husband used to say to the kids, whenever they grew an inch or had a birthday, “I thought I told you to stop growing up so fast!” Well, you know kids…they never listen, so Nick, like the rest of them, went on and grew up fast.
I’m looking forward to hanging out with grown up Nick. I think he’ll be pretty awesome. Good genes.
You can read more of Gwen’s writing by visiting her blog – a life less ordinary.
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10 Responses to My Child, The Grown Up
Is this your last one to turn 18? I found you never stop with the motherly duties, they just change. Mine are 26, 29 and 31 and they still ask for advice and guidance once in a while. Then you become a grandmother and that takes on a whole life of it’s own. It’s amazing to see the little baby you raised become a mother and raise a baby of her own! I so agree with you, you blink and they are grown. If I had one piece of advice to give a young mother it would be to enjoy every minute and not sweat the small stuff because it is over so soon. Rhonda
I am pretty sure Gwen has one more child at home because I remember reading about his basketball tryouts.
Time does go way to fast. My “kids” are 24 and 28 and both have birthdays coming up in August and September. Just yesterday we were running to one’s baseball game after school and the other’s basketball game that night……or so it seems.
One thing I know for sure is that I will never stop mothering my sons. Whether they like it or not. My youngest was upset with me the other day because he was going to a July 4th barbecue and called me to ask where his swim trunks were and I called him back and said ” be sure and put on sun screen.” I mean we live in the land of the sun and it was 90 degrees out and he is fair skinned and has already had several moles removed and checked. There was a long pause on the phone and he said ” of course.”
The next night he was over to our house and he complained about it to my husband and I overheard. I looked at him and said ” I will never stop being your mother. I am 55 years old and my 82 year old Mom still tells me to bring a sweater along and asks me if I am eating enough vegetables! I gave birth to you and spent years caring for you. It just doesn’t stop when you reach the age of 20. So get use to it!”
He walked over to me and gave me a kiss and said “OK.”
Great post, Gwen. Raising a child is so weird, isn’t it? It’s like, they don’t really tell you that you are going to have to let the kid go in the end. Or if they tell you, you don’t hear it.
I know what you mean. I had my oldest two very close together, so I got hit with the high school graduations back to back. That was hard, emotionally.
I was lucky enough to have several children and the rest are spaced further apart. My baby just graduated from Kindergarten. So that helped less the “blow”! I’ve now got my two oldest moving out at the end of summer. I’m losing them both at the same time. Double whammy again.
(But I’m kinda looking forward to having a slightly less chaotic house. Shhh! Don’t tell anyone!)
Gwen, the picture of you and your son is so sweet. I hope he had a great birthday. All those years of doing the mom stuff and I never did learn how to tie a tie. I remember taking mine over to the neighbor’s house to have him put it on when their dad was away. I couldn’t teach the older ones to drive either. I just was too much of a control freak and it was best for all if I wasn’t involved. Luckily, one of her older brothers has promised to take care of that when it’s time for my last little one to drive.
I think one of the strangest things for me was having to look up at the boys instead of down. How does that happen? Every stage of the process has it’s great moments that soften the blow of them growing up and being on their own. But, it’s always bittersweet and part of me wants the older ones to be little again.
Ugh! My oldest turned 18 this spring. Yes, it goes too fast. I completely agree with you , Gwen.
Rhonda, my mom shares the same advice- don’t sweat the small stuff. Relax and enjoy.
Looks like a lot of us were pregnant around the same time. My daughter turned 18 last fall and graduated high school this June.
The 18th birthday was strange. On one hand, it was kind of “big”, but life continues pretty much the same – probably because she will likely be doing at least her first year of college at home.
I do find myself letting “go” in small ways. There are some things I will always be there for and other lessons that she will have to learn on her own.
Pam, I loved that your son could appreciate your concern in the end.
Very touching piece, Gwen. Thank you!
I love the pic of you and your son. He’s a good looking guy and I agree that he has good genes, just look at his Momma!
I don’t have kids yet so I don’t know the feeling totally but I agree that time flies. It sounds like you were a great mom though so you set him up well for this next phase of life:-)
Thanks all! I love that picture, too. I have one more child to turn 18 — out of four! I just can’t believe how fast the time flies by. Truly. I’m really finding it hard to imagine my house without children’s voices ringing in the air…Being a mom now for more than 25 years, it’s what I do…defining, you know? I am feeling a definite shift coming…
Gwen says…I am feeling a definite shift coming…
I can imagine that shift is a little unsettling, but also a little exciting. I am sure that many new adventures await you!
And as Pam points out, we will always be moms and our kids are always going to need us (whether they realize it or not!)