I’ve always wanted to read War and Peace but never seemed able to find the time or the energy. I tried several times to read this lengthy tome written in 1869 by Leo Tolstoy, but the stress and anxiety of getting through so many pages made me break out in hives just picking the book up. If I had read it, I might have had the satisfaction of learning something about a great time long past. Also, I imagined what it would feel like being able to discuss and quote Tolstoy over port and cheese with well-read literary types.

Over the years I have kept putting it off until all I really want to know is what the book is all about. Maybe then I could at least bluff my way through a literary conversation and still enjoy the port and cheese. Then again, I may eat and drink more than converse.

One day not so long ago I was killing time at my neighborhood library when to my excitement I came across the 1956 Paramount movie version of War and Peace. I read the cover eagerly…starring Audrey Hepburn, Henry Fonda and Mel Ferrer. I love old movies and thought this was the answer to my prayers.

When I got home I tripped over myself in my rush for the DVD player. I put it on and sat back on the couch waiting for Audrey, Henry and Mel to bring Tolstoy to life.

Three hours and twenty-eight minutes later I wanted to hang myself from boredom. Who in their right mind would spend this much time watching a movie that was made over fifty years ago?. I wondered if the book was as drawn out as the movie. The sound quality was so terrible and the DVD skipped all over the place. In comparison the hives from actually reading the book might have been better than the migraine the movie gave me. Anyway, by the end I could have cared less about France, Russia, Napoleon, Natasha, Pierre or Prince Andrei! Oh Woe is thine who thinks that watching a few well-paid actors could do justice to a book the size of Tolstoy’s.

This War and Peace goal has since been crossed off my To-Do-Before-I-Die List, at least for the time being. But who knows maybe when I retire I might put it back on.. Of course, I may go blind reading it. Maybe I should be content with my decision to waive any intellectual conversation regarding this subject with literary types. I’m beginning to realize that sometimes a slight shift in a goal can be quite releasing.

Cozied up to a fireplace with a blanket draped across my legs reading a Jane Austen classic is just fine for me. I also have discovered that port and cheese go well with Jane too.

You didn’t honestly think I was going to let the port and cheese go, did you?

The most difficult thing – but essential one – is to love Life,

to love even while one suffers, because Life is all, Life is God,

and to love Life means to love God.

Tolstoy “WAR and PEACE”